Yarns from an Earnest, Savvy, & Fetching Librarian

letters to my sister: 1

2011-08-05T14:55:00.006-04:00

So, my sister, just moved to the UAE. This is a pretty big deal and makes my inter-provincial move look like nothin'.

A friend suggested that we write letters to each other via our blogs (love the camel motif btw), now, I never got around to actually discussing this idea with my sister, but decided I would write some letters to her on my blog either way.

Dear Karen,

You left yesterday, which was emotional for everyone, but we seem to be dealing okay back here in Canada.

We've heard from you via a really echo-y phonecall from your fancy hotel, I have a feeling the time change is going to be a challenge to navigate, but I'm sure we'll manage.

Dad's first question is and will always be, how hot is it there? :P This is a variation of the typical southern Ontario summer greeting "hot enough for ya?".

My initial questions will be food and hotel related: what have you been eating? what do they serve at the hotel? is there any junk food? what was breakfast like?

what are the free toiletries like? (as you know I am very serious about the freebies in a hotel and will attempt to gather as many as possible)
how is the pool area?
do you have cable?
what is on the cable?
on a scale of 1 - 10 rate the awesomeness of the bed.

I looked through pictures of your hotel with Mom...wowzers dude, Karen's Klassy Adventure has begun!

Also, if you go to the themepark that is on this island, you must blog that in Great detail.

Of course I have more questions and they are likely the same as yours...what will your apartment be like? your school? your neighbourhood? etc.

But I think I shall reiterate my 'sisterly advice' that I was yammering at you as you packed on your last day home:

~ Wear sunscreen every day

~ Keep hydrated

~ Pay close attention to the new set of social & cultural norms, perhaps jot them down

~ Give chickpeas a chance they are a diverse & nutritious food

~ Always do plenty of research before you travel anywhere (or ask your favourite reference librarian)

~ Go on some historical tours, the are interesting and fun!

~ Easy on the swears

~ Call Mom & Dad lots

~ Sample some of the local teas (this is not so much advice as it is "what michelle would do" or WMWD)

~ Buy a hat with a big brim (never forget how pasty we really are)

~ and finally, Stay Alert, Play Safe!

~ also, have fun. ;)

Life in Canada

What plans does Michelle have in store?

1. Dinner at everyone's favourite German style eatery

2. A trip to the local cinema

3. A certain nostalgic concert experience (cue the screaming "girls"/women)

4. A train trip (featuring egg salad sandwiches & cold kitkat bars)

5. Another Agatha Christie novel

6. Bookclub

7. Shakespeare in the park ("Out, damn'd spot! out, I say!—One; two: why, then
'tis time to do't.—Hell is murky...")

8. Montreal bagels

9. Chocolate milkshakes at the cuckoo clock store...

It's okay to be jealous.

Miss you, talk soon, *virtual fist bump*
Michelle

PS THIS JUST IN: Anderson Cooper has his own daytime talk show starting soon! Aren't you heartbroken you're going to miss it!?!

30 for 81 days

2011-06-26T12:57:00.008-04:00

Hi there,

So first things first, I realized that I never finished my 30 in 30: 30 Things I'd like to do in my 30th year: 26-30

In review:

1. Learn to cook more recipes

2. Get a smartphone

3. Take a vacation

4. Learn to meditate

5. Buy a grown-up couch

6. Have walls in a colour other than white or builders beige

7. Finish more books (check!)

8. Pay down one of my school loans

9. Own several pairs of comfortable, stylish shoes, instead of just the one

10. Feel freer

11. Find an aesthetically pleasing & functional tea set

12. Attend an opera

13. Keep a plant alive

14. Sew something, even a button, as long as it stays on/together

15. Hang framed prints rather than posters

16. Learn how to do handy things properly, like install curtain rods or put together Ikea furniture by myself

17. Do something creative in a non-digital environment

18. Take more photos

19. Commit to a hair dresser (check!)

20. Sleep

21. Avoid serious injury

22. Avoid food poisoning

23. Get better winter boots

24. Plan better

25. Write more

*

26. Rock hard at a giant U2 concert, on the floor, near the stage (done & done.)

27. Be part of a super-awesome bookclub, who also eats plenty of delicious cake (also done.)

28. Become addicted to a whole new set of tv series, already available on DVD (in progress.)

29. Embrace uncertainty (in progress.)

30. Maintain my awesome.

**

M.

may 3

2011-05-03T11:45:00.001-04:00

via Karen, http://fuckyeahnouns.com/

M.

royal friday

2011-04-29T19:32:00.003-04:00

I didn't get up at 4am to watch the wedding, I needed the sleep for my 5 hour train ride after a full day at work.

My fellow blogger ShimmerShine attended and live-blogged it all for our reading pleasure.

I woke up at 7:15, got dressed and turned on CBC, I managed to catch the carriage procession from the church to the castle. Kate's dress was gorgeous and based on Grace Kelly's I believe, she looked beautiful.

I caught the Queen in canary yellow, with matching hat. Kate's sister Pippa also looked lovely. And most importantly, I caught a glimpse of Andrew & Fergie's daughters wearing THE CRAZIEST HATS EVER.

Then I had to leave for work.

I had to take the shuttle bus to our other campus today, got on, saw a couple coworkers and mentioned I had seen a bit of the procession.

Suddenly, next to us, a woman said "I've been watching since 4!" And passed over her iphone on which she was Still watching coverage.

We watched for the length of the bus ride and saw the balcony kisses in all their glory, with continual narration from our new friend, the owner of the iphone.

The Fug Girls have the best coverage:

Royal Weddingpalooza: A Look Back

Fugs & Pieces: Royal Wedding Edition

I think I need to get myself a crazy hat...

M.

getting older

2011-04-28T23:18:00.004-04:00

Today in aging is brought to us by xkcd:

*

I wanted to slap someone in the laundry room tonight, but I didn't, I feel like that was really adult of me.

*

M.

yum

2011-04-27T22:18:00.003-04:00

First timer post:

I ate at an Ethiopian restaurant this evening.

Le Nil Bleu

You eat with you hands (they provide you with hot towels) and it is usually a collective plate.

I like the communal aspect of eating from a shared plate.

We had vegetarian, you eat all the different foods with a special kind of bread.

I wasn't sure how to feel about the bread, it was kinda like sponge cake but not sweet, and the consistency with savory food was a little strange for me.

It was delicious all in all and very filling.

M.

reading, electronically

2011-04-26T23:52:00.003-04:00

I got a Kobo! It was a surprise early birthday gift, delivered to my door this morning!

So far, I've set it up, charged it and perused the online store.

I think I will read one of the pre-loaded classics first, there is a blog poll up to decide which one.

I'll be sure to blog my ereader experiences as they come. I have a train trip coming up, so this is perfect timing.

I shall go out to find a handsome carrying case for it tomorrow.

M.

you must have missed me..

2011-04-25T21:37:00.003-04:00

Okay, I failed. I was having a nice weekend and didn't post everyday.

My sister was visiting and some of you, also readers of her blog, may point out that she posted this weekend and to that I say, ... shut up.

*

I voted in the advance polls. I was happy to see a line-up on the first day of the open polls. I felt very democratic.

*

I felt a little embarrassed in the seasonal section of Shoppers today, looking for easter chocolate on sale, until I looked around and noted many other people my age doing the same.

So, I grabbed my big chocolate easter bunny and went to the cash with my head held high.

*

I received a couple lovely birthday gifts from my sister this weekend (ahead of the main event, because she will be back in the North)

A way cool, teal/turquoise tea pot with infuser from David's

She also treat us to a trip to the water spa, which has quickly become my new favourite thing to do. This time we went to Bota Bota in the Old Port of Montreal. It's a converted boat and is a pretty cool concept, there are also outdoor decks, which was a really nice contrast.

Thanks Karen!

*

There is a new art & music installation in Montreal, at Place des Arts. There are swings that each play different notes.

21 Balancoires

I think myself and some of my fellow Montrealers really ought to plan a swinging outing!

*

I saw someone crazy Phoebe jogging on the mountain today, and delightfully, he was wearing very purple jogging pants.

*

I may or may not have watched the William & Kate made-for-tv-movie....

If you're excited about the royal wedding, then you definitely want to follow Shimmershine's coverage this week.

M.

v is for vote

2011-04-21T23:40:00.003-04:00

I'm going to vote in the advance polls tomorrow. I'll be in Ontario during election day, so I'm glad I'm around to cast my vote this weekend.

Although I do think it's a bit unfortunate for it to be on Easter weekend, because not everyone will be able to get away to vote.

This isn't a political blog, it's a silly one, but I do thinking voting is important.

We have a responsibility, if we care about the direction that this country will go in, to vote for someone whose platform and convictions we agree with.

Our voter turnout is usually pretty low, but every vote counts.

It'll take 20 minutes to do on May 2nd what many people are still fighting to have the chance to do in their own countries. It also wasn't so long ago that women couldn't vote in this country.

I won't tell you who to vote for, that's up to you, figure out who values the same things that you value.

Get informed about the candidates and issues: CBC or you know, you can just take a look at at few of these photos, and then go out and vote.

End of speech.

M.

etc.

2011-04-20T21:28:00.002-04:00

I decided, as a social experiment..on myself I guess, that I would watch 'Extreme Couponing' on TLC.

What the hell is that, you ask?

It's a reality show about crazy people who spend a great deal of their time gathering/clipping/organizing coupons and matching sales to get hundreds of dollars in groceries and household products free with those coupons.

So, it is pretty amazing, these people have huge stockpiles of food and stuff in their homes that they've paid almost nothing for.

They're like organized hoarders with more money saved.

Many do give the extra items to food banks and charitable organizations, which is great.

When they go and ring in the items and then take the coupons off the HUGE amount, and you see the savings it is impressive.

However, what I fail to understand is the faux drama produced by the mounting amount on the register...will they or won't they have planned properly!?! Will they save enough!?! Will they have to pay a $500 grocery bill!?!

Okay, 2 points:

1. This stuff is at the center of these people's lives, so yeah, they planned right, they have lots of experience, they understand how the system works, it'll be okay.

2. If they didn't check out properly or per say, the coupons were wrong or something, they wouldn't have to pay the $600. They could ask the transaction to be voided, like it happens all the time, people need things taken off their grocery bill if they have a set amount of money to spend.

Yes, you would feel like a jackass and yes, you would be one, because the person at the til would have a hell of a time voiding, but like, they aren't going to hold you to it if you don't have the money.

It's not like a meal has been made at a restaurant or labour has been put into fixing your car and you can't pay.

Just sayin.

*

Michelle gives you entertainment advice you didn't ask for:

I'm in the midst of Mad Men Season 4 on Netflix and am late to the game on it, I always thought "meh, advertising..the clothes look nice..I dunno". It is SO good, if you're not watching, go do.

It's dramatic, it can be depressing, but the writing is amazing. And the characters are fantastic and the wardrobe is the cherry on top of it all. Get on it ya'll.

Do you watch Raising Hope? It's on after Glee on Fox and it's really fun and charming. It's a lower class family who had their son when they were teens, he's grown up, slept with a serial killer on the run, she had his baby and was executed and now the family is raising the baby.

It sounds deranged and it kinda is, but it's also pretty funny.

I'm reading Kate Morton's first book, The House at Riverton, I'm about halfway and am really enjoying. It's historical, during WWI, in England, grand house, from the household staff's point of view and there is a tragedy unfolding that is being eluded too.

I've heard great things about her book, The Forgotten Garden, so that will likely be next.

*

Did you know how happy we are in Canada? (CBC)

We're so happy we're like the second in the world, the Danes are happier, but the Swedes, they're just as happy as we are.

We're also way happier than the Brits, maybe because the entire country has been prepping for a wedding for like, a really long time? Maybe.

*

M.

concert envy

2011-04-19T23:20:00.003-04:00

Today's smiles and feelings of goodwill are brought to us by Arcade Fire at Coachella..

Wake Up (this is the finale, with all the bells & whistles)

No Cars Go (featuring some bad-ass accordion playing)

And also this angry bunny at a tea party.

*

Blogging everyday is hard, yo.

*

M.

30 misses & hits

2011-04-18T09:00:00.001-04:00

Things I miss about being a kid:

Swinging on the swing-set for hours

Going to the library and finding 15 picture books to take out, knowing I can go through them in a week

Playing in the ball pit at chuck e. cheese/mcdonald's/that one kids clothing store in Centre Mall

Building a fort with blankets and couch cushions

via Natalie Dee

Colouring and cut n' paste

Barbie fashion shows

Sledding

Wearing track pants all.the.time

Disney/Broadway duets with my sister when we should've been doing homework

Being read to

Arranging my dollhouse to be just so

Floating in a pool for hours on end in the summer

Dress-up

Lego build-a-thons

Seeing my friends everyday

Things I like about adulthood:

Flexible bedtime

No math homework

Not everything is bubblegum flavoured

Sushi

The internet

The ability to see more of the world

No one forces me to run track or do the long jump

The ability to spoil my supper with fewer witnesses

More confidence in myself

"Disposable" income

Rock shows

Spas

HBO & AMC

The ability to vote (for serious, I was so excited to be able to vote when I turned 18)

Longer books with bigger words

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!

2011-04-17T13:52:00.001-04:00

Love you...Miss you..

Paul and I hope you have an awesome day :)

Michelle

hidden

2011-04-16T23:58:00.000-04:00

I had to repost this photo, because not only is this a pretty bookshelf, it's also a secret passage!!

Source: FuckYeahBookshelves

When I was younger, I wanted a house with a secret passage, library, dumb waiter, elevator, window seats, canopy bed and solarium.

So basically, I wanted to live inside the game of Clue, minus the grisly murders.

I'm not entirely sure what shenanigans I was planning to engage in with access to these secret passages, but it would have been awesome, I'm sure.

I always pictured myself in a massive house when I was little, possibly because I grew up in an apartment.

I now see the error of my ways, with a big house comes many rooms to clean and fill with furniture and lots of property taxes.

These days I just picture a really pretty condo or loft with a dishwasher and washer/dryer combo.

I wouldn't sneeze at a window seat though..

M.

12

2011-04-15T22:32:00.000-04:00

Day 12 of 30 til 30:

30 Things I'd like to do in my 30th year: 21-25

21. Avoid serious injury

22. Avoid food poisoning

23. Get better winter boots

24. Plan better

25. Write more

*

M.

this week: cadbury mini eggs

2011-04-14T22:51:00.004-04:00

A break from our regularly scheduled programming, I am going to stop the countdown for a moment & just make some observations/weirdness/rhetorical blog questions:

*

I've had a pain in my side for about a week, I went to the clinic today and was told that I was having muscle spasms or pulled muscles, which according to my timeline of symptoms means I pulled a muscle...in my sleep. Doing nothing.

Yeah, I've got talents.

*

I am refusing to turn my heat back on, even though it is pretty cold tonight. I am determined that this is unnecessary. THE WEATHER WILL GET BETTER SOON! *laughs manically*

*

Lately, everytime I go to a pharmacy to buy something for my apt/washroom, I also purchase some kinda Easter candy and then eat it immediately.

Easter candy & chocolate is by far the best sweets season of the year.

*

Here's a question: what is it with campus health clinics showing multiple episodes mid-nineties American sitcoms in their waiting rooms?

My examples include Friends and The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. (yeah, Will Smith's rap is now playing in your head..I'll wait for it to finish)

*

So, in terms of greeting card selection, why is it that there are multiple cards for the 'milestone ages' of 16, 21, 40, 50, 60, etc. But only like one lame card for 30?

(this has nothing to do with my impending bday, but that of others also reaching this milestone, which it is, I mean come on ya'll)

I guess I'll just have to go with something stylish looking or clever, because goodness knows I'm not going to find anything funny either.

*

New poll up. (psst it's political!)

M.

11

2011-04-13T22:42:00.004-04:00

Day 11 of 30 til 30:

30 Things I'd like to do in my 30th year: 16-20

16. Learn how to do handy things properly, like install curtain rods or put together Ikea furniture by myself

17. Do something creative in a non-digital environment

18. Take more photos

19. Commit to a hair dresser

20. Sleep

*

M.

10

2011-04-12T22:34:00.002-04:00

Day 10 of 30 til 30:

30 Things I'd like to do in my 30th year: 11-15

11. Find an aesthetically pleasing & functional tea set

12. Attend an opera

13. Keep a plant alive

14. Sew something, even a button, as long as it stays on/together

15. Hang framed prints rather than posters

*

M.

9

2011-04-11T19:48:00.003-04:00

Day 9 of 30 til 30:

30 Things I'd like to do in my 30th year: 6-10

6. Have walls in a colour other than white or builders beige

7. Finish more books

8. Pay down one of my school loans

9. Own several pairs of comfortable, stylish shoes, instead of just the one

10. Feel freer

*

M.

8

2011-04-10T23:38:00.002-04:00

Day 8 of 30 til 30:

30 Things I'd like to do in my 30th year: The first 5

1. Learn to cook more recipes

2. Get a smartphone

3. Take a vacation

4. Learn to meditate

5. Buy a grown-up couch

**

Poll results:

Majority - 4 of my readers wonder, Michelle, can you Actually get up at 6am, I mean, really..?

Yeah, I'm really really not a morning person, so this could be pretty rough, especially since I need to go to work that day as well.

2nd place - 3 of my readers think it's crazytalk.

It's pretty early and silly, but, then again, I do love a good wedding.

1 each of my readers think I should and will be up as well.

Only time will tell on this one, I mean, I might even set an alarm and wake up, but getting out of bed is another story entirely.

If I do watch, I'll be sure to blog about it.

M.

7

2011-04-09T23:44:00.003-04:00

Day 7 of 30 til 30:

So, I recently saw this ad for an amazing new frozen pizza.

This is how I picture the pitch meeting:

"So, how are we gonna sell frozen pizza in a different way?"

"Could we try to improve the taste of the pizza, then I mean, more people will want to eat it?"

"Well, I guess we could try that, but oh, I know, let's just put some cookies in there! Everyone loves cookies! That way, by the time they eat the cookies, they forget how the pizza actually tastes!"

"This is brilliant, how soon can we roll it out?"

*

The future is now.

M.

6

2011-04-08T21:23:00.005-04:00

Day 6 of 30 til 30:

Things that are Awesome on the Internet

Perfect Miniature Muppet Show Stage

Perfect Miniature Muppet Show Backstage

Find out how the world was going to end the year you were born!

Transformers dancing to Thriller (which is exactly what it sounds like, and also it appears to be during their Transformers Office Christmas party)

Xanadu (no idea what this is? it's on Netflix, watch it, you won't regret the decision)

Royal Wedding Accouterments (including...a special donut)

*

Things that are Awesome for Michelle

I turned off the heat in my apartment.

Two new places to get tea in my neighbourhood.

I got a new cardigan for $18.

Kudos at work.

Deathly Hallows Part One on DVD next week!

Visits and birthdays and long weekends and summer hours at work.

M.

5

2011-04-07T22:21:00.006-04:00

Day 5 of 30 til 30:

It's important to be open & try new things, especially when you need to post a blog everyday for 30 days.

Today I decided to try something new that I had been thinking about for a while now...Peanut Butter Snickers.

Sounds delightful doesn't it? I am not trying it without some trepidation, Snickers is my favourite chocolate bar, and it's difficult to improve on a classic like that.

It's in two little square portions, not quite bit sized.

(still making it non-movie snack approved, approved candies include Smarties, M&Ms, Twizzlers; other candies/bars could crumble chocolate onto my clothes in the dark and then bam! you have stubborn stains).

It was sweet and peanutty, with the right amount of caramel, but the peanut butter, I must admit, was a little lacking in quality.

It was not Reese level peanut butter, could've been smoother, it tasted good, all the same.

Snickers is still king, but Peanut Butter Snickers can be declared as a strong Duke of chocolate bars.

If I want a high quotient of peanut butter, I'll still go for a Peanut Butter Cup.

The sharks seem to like it..

M.

4

2011-04-06T23:05:00.003-04:00

Day 4 of 30 til 30:

30 things that are probably a bigger deal than turning 30.

1. Getting a job.

2. Moving.

3. Winning a major award.

4. Getting a puppy/kitten.

5. Having your writing published.

6. Being elected to office.

7. Finding out that your crap is actually worth a lot of money on the Antiques Roadshow.

8. Giving birth.

9. Buying a home.

10. Meeting a muppet.

11. Earning a PhD.

12. Having surgery.

13. Performing at Radio City Music Hall.

14. Having your numbers come up on the lottery.

15. Getting married.

16. The invention of the printing press.

17. Solving a crime.

18. Swimming with sharks.

19. Building something that doesn’t fall down right away.

20. Getting a bad perm.

21. Being punched in the face.

22. Moving into an apartment that has a dishwasher and en suite washer/dryer combo included in the rent.

23. Having a building/park/bridge/library named in your honour.

24. Winning BOTH showcases on the Price is Right.

25. Jumping out of a plane.

26. Going into space.

27. Early man’s discovery of how to make fire.

28. Getting air lifted out of somewhere.

29. Finding the image of yourself with a blurred out face on Google Streetview doing something rude and/or awesome.

30. Turning 40.

3

2011-04-05T21:14:00.003-04:00

Day 3 of 30 til 30:

If you know anything about Michelle, you'll know that she loves a good movie musical (she also loves a good stage musical, but that is another list entirely).

They have made me very happy these 30 years and will continue to do so in the future. And so...

Michelle's 30 Favourite Movie Musicals:

An American in Paris
Singin' in the Rain
Moulin Rouge
The Lion King
Rent
Once
The Music Man
The Wizard of Oz
Beauty and the Beast
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
White Christmas
Easter Parade
Meet Me in St. Louis
Chicago
The King and I
Sleeping Beauty
Cinderella
The Little Mermaid
West Side Story
The Sound of Music
Bedknobs and Broomsticks
That's Entertainment!
Rocky Horror Picture Show
Grease
Annie
Labyrinth
Dirty Dancing
Aladdin
The Grinch
Across the Universe

2

2011-04-04T18:07:00.004-04:00

Day 2 of 30 til 30:

So, confession, I didn't quite figure out what to do with the 30 til 30 concept, I'll definitely post once a day, but it will likely be a variety of things.

Yesterday, I posted about something I had never done before, today was cold, gray and crap outside, so I did not do anything new and interesting.

Instead, I thought I would post on the list of things I did today that were absolutely typical Michelle. (all of which are Super grown up)

1. Pressed my snooze button far too many times and then had to rush around all morning.

TYPICAL. I swear, somedays I think I really should move in with someone (a morning person) just to help with the morning. I mean really, I can live a life without love and romance, I honestly just need someone who can facilitate a functional morning routine for me.

2. Took a while to figure out what to wear.

My wardrobe doesn't change! Why does this take me so long!

3. Under-dressed for the weather.

Yep, it's not spring yet.

4. Added 5 extra minutes to my walk to and from work, to stay inside as long as possible.

See number 3.

5. Didn't bring a lunch...

...because I'm lazy.

6. Spent a great deal of time scrutinizing the military time via rail uses when they post train times.

I'm always afraid I'm going to book the wrong time and I know what you're thinking, 'just subtract 12', yes yes I know, but I can't just glance at the times and know right away what they are, it just doesn't stick.

7. Had to use a break to go back to a Montreal business where I had left something several days before, hoping they still had it somewhere.

They did, I have been pretty lucky in this regard thus far.

8. Hid food and drinks in paper cups in tote bags so I could consume them in my office.

Did it twice today. To be fair, I didn't have my travel mug because I had forgotten it somewhere... (see above)

9. Stopped at the grocery store on the way home because I had nothing for dinner.

Only on the days that end with "y".

*

Atypical things I did today:

+ Brought my umbrella out on a rainy day
+Refrained from a 3pm snack
+Remembered to get milk
+Did not knock anything into the toilet

*

All in all, it's not too tragic.

M.

1

2011-04-03T20:58:00.004-04:00

Day 1 of 30 til 30:

A first today, I went to a water spa. A Scandinavian style spa, the concept is a hot, cold, relax circuit. The particular spa I went to had several options for all three parts of the circuit.

Hot

Finnish sauna - my first, quite warm, but pleasant.

Steam bath - also my first, very eucalyptus-y & pretty intense.

Hot bath - not my first, but my favourite.

Cold

Cold plunge/bath - I couldn't do it, too icy for me.

Nordic shower - we're all been there, your water heater conks out, someone else in the house uses all the hot water; but this was on purpose, I used it after the hot treatments each time, it was pretty frosty.

Relax

They have all these quiet areas with various bean bag chairs and pillows, and they were awesome. I would like to have a Fatboy chair for my home. I can see taking many a nap on one of these bad boys under a sunny window.

Unfortunately, they are 300 dollars.

All in all, it was an excellent time, incredibly relaxing. I was a first, but not a last visit, I'm sure.

M.

v is for victory

2011-03-20T21:43:00.006-04:00

That's my Latte of Victory above. I got it on the way home Thursday because I finished teaching for the academic term. Since I last posted to the blog, I also had a contract renewal.

(Natalie Dee)

*

I just read this short piece on Jezebel on Learning How to Cook, filed under the heading "Being an Adult" and I can totally relate.

I am slightly better off than the author, I have turned on and even used my oven quite often, I mean, a frozen pizza won't cook itself.

I decided to make something for reals last weekend and it turned out...not well, I had all the ingredients and followed the directions, but the results were undercooked (no meat was involved) and rather..clumpy?

I will also, in fact, have a taco night this week.

I'm not completely hopeless, I can cook meat properly, all the way through. I can make scrambled eggs. I'm pretty adept at making sandwiches.

I just lack the creativity you need in the kitchen and even when I am following a recipe, it never turns out right.

Maybe I should take a cooking class, because really, it would make my life more interesting & possibly delicious.

**
Poll Results:

The vote is split and completely tied for which ebook reader ya'll think I ought to obtain.

Kindle, Kobo, iPad all have 2 votes.

Sony is lonely with 1 vote.

2 of you think I should wait see who is still standing when the smoke clears and 2 of you think I should stick to print.

The jury is definitely still out, I am likely leaning towards the Kobo, because A) it is the cheapest, and B) it uses e-ink and is most like reading a book without a lot of other bells & whistles.

I'll let you know.

**

I've seen a few movies since we last spoke:

The Adjustment Bureau = meh

Barney's Version = funny, well acted, lots of Canadian cameos and filmed in my neighbourhood in Montreal

Jane Eyre = very well done, they did justice to the book, plus Judi Dench bonus!

I've also tried some new teas:

Fantasy Island (David's) - delicious, very coconut-y
Glitter & Gold (David's) - very cinnamony and comforting
Decaf English Breakfast (Twinnings) - Finally! A Decaf english breakfast that doesn't suck!

*

I've been watching a lot of netflix and even *gasp* considering canceling my cable..it hasn't happened just yet. I suppose life without cable would mean depending on the internets for serendipitous discovery of entertainment. It would also mean fewer episodes of Sisterwives and the entirety of the Food Network to "happen upon".

Most of my friends don't have cable, or even a tv in some cases. This would be a big step for a guy like me.

*

We've just hit the mark of '30 days until I turn 30'. I was thinking of doing a series on the blog, but haven't quite reasoned out what that might be.

30 days of Michelle facts (I might get bored of that after about a week..)

30 things in 30 days before I turn 30 (This would mean actually doing something new & interesting everyday for 30 days, and I mean, I'm pretty lazy..)

30 notable 30 year olds.. (picking up where I left off last year with how my contemporaries and I measure up)

I'll do the first post of some kind this evening, if ya'll have any brilliant ideas, you can let me know.

*

new poll up.

*

M.

i swear

2011-03-07T21:22:00.009-05:00

I saw a tweet about this site earlier today and my sister has already clearly embraced it, so I thought I would share few of my own.

M.

Look there she goes that girl is so peculiar...I wonder if she's feeling well

2011-03-04T21:18:00.006-05:00

Last poll results were in and ya'll (well, at least 4 of you) wanted me to live-blog my first viewing of the Beauty and the Beast DVD.

So, I did just that.

Beauty & the Beast, Special Edition - DVD Live Blog

I'm all set, on the couch with some Mango fro-yo ready to watch Beauty and the Beast!

This was always my favourite Disney movie and I was pretty darn excited to see it finally come out on DVD for my ownership and multiple viewings.

And the movie opens story-book style, in stained glass, which I know off by heart, as the audio is included on the soundtrack, which along with The Little Mermaid, Phantom of the Opera, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat and The Lion King soundtracks were the homework music of choice for my sister and I.

"for who could ever learn to love....a beast?" Well, me, and also probably Belle.

Enter Belle! About to sing my FAVOURITE song. " Little town, it's quiet village..."

Um, that village bookshop is clearly a LIBRARY. She borrows books, doesn't buy them, no fooling me!

Her name does mean 'beauty', as per the lyric, this movie might teach me some french!

Enter Gaston. la douche.

Why is Belle such an odd girl out, because she reads? really? no one else reads?

I honestly never realized that I basically know this movie off by heart before now.

Dear Belle's father: everyone knows if your horse has that expressive of a face, he clearly knows more than you, and you really should go the way he directs you.

Oh no! bats! wolves! run Bell's father, run!

Okay question, how has no one ever noticed the giant castle that the beast lives in before, like isn't it pretty tall and imposing?

COGSWORTH & LUMIERE! Um also Jerry Orbach was Lumiere, you may know him as Baby's dad in Dirty Dancing and Dect. Lenny Briscoe on Law & Order.

The beast sounds like Worf, is it Worf? checking... nope.

Surprise wedding! to gross Gaston...unfortunate.

I have detected a plot hole, why does the beast need a prisoner? I mean, why does he need to trade Belle for her father? He certainly wasn't gonna like hang out with Belle's father.

The inhabitants of the castle think Belle might be their savior but like, not the old man. I guess he is a beast and might not really have reasons for doing these things.

Dear Belle: I understand you're pretty devastated and trapped in a castle with a beast-man, but you do appear to have a bedroom with a wicked view AND a canopy bed! I Always wanted a princess canopy bed. Someday...

"No one's slick as Gaston..."

Now, I realize that Belle's father has shown signs of being eccentric & perhaps a little nutty..but he is saying that Belle has been kidnapped and is being held somewhere. And does anyone in town actually know where Belle is? I mean, there could be a kernel of truth in his exclamations.

How do the tiny 2 foot tall household items turn the doorhandles? Think about it...

Magic mirror that shows you anything & anyone? A wee bit creepy, no?

My second favourite part, Be Our Guest. epic. I never realized how similar this song is to "I think I'm gonna like it here" from Annie.

Now, after the floor show, it's off to poking around in the West Wing where Belle isn't Supposed to go and where the beast apparently keeps his extra creepy collection of hell-beast sculptures, for some reason.

Enchanted rose under glass...she wants to touch it, I mean after everything she has seen with the magical dancing and singing flatware, is the rose really that amazing?

Scene: LIBRARY LIBRARY LIBRARY! It really is the best library ever. Like, I can see how she might be thinking, "I could live here".

Is there any librarian out there who can watch this movie and not be jealous?

Also, it has spiral staircases! and good light! The only thing I didn't notice were any overstuffed comfy chairs...these are essential in a home-library. The beast should get on that.

Note: "Something there that wasn't there before" will get into your head for all eternity..you'll hum it at work, people might think you're crazy, just an fyi.

Um, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS, A NEW SONG!?! "Human Again" apparently. It was was okay. I'm sure all the 'folks' in the castle really wants to be humans and not household objects, especially like, the plates...ew. (Was this song original, and cut, or did they add it later...?)

More new scenes: The beast can't read? interesting. And Belle decided the first thing he reads is Shakespeare, that's not so nice Belle.

Man, I love the coat rack/hair dresser.

When I went to my highschool prom, I had a blue puffy skirt dress, like Cinderella. If I was ever going to have a princessy dress again, it would be like Belle's in the ballroom scene, but not yellow, I don't have the skin tone for yellow. (where would I go in this dress, I have no idea, details details...)

Ballroom scene: is this CGI or something, it looks so different from the rest of the movie. This part is very Maria and Captain Von Trapp dancing in The Sound of Music, no?

Okay, plot hole question, when Belle realizes that her father is sick and needs help and the beast releases her, why doesn't she just get him and bring him to the wicked castle, where she is comfortable and there are teams of servants and magic, etc.?

I mean, surely they could help get him better. Or the beast could like, go with her, since they've seen on two occasions that there are wolves in the woods!

Instead she takes off on her own and brings him home to their house in the village and out pops Chip.

oh Hai, enchanted tea cup, I guess you'll just hang out with us now...shouldn't be too hard to explain you to the rest of the nosy townfolk.

Ew the asylum guy is way creepy. And Gaston is so slimy.

Dear Gaston: Blackmailing Belle (by sending her father to an insane asylum) to get her to marry you would likely backfire someday, like maybe the day she poisons your dinner, or suffocates you in your sleep or pushes you into a well...that is another movie entirely.

Oh no, crowd hysteria..that was a bit too easy. I mean, I guess they did already have the flaming torches. Good villain song though.

NOW they all notice the giant castle.

Seriously Gaston, no means no, you need to just get over it, there are those 3 slutty looking blondes in town who would all have your children.

Yeah! Gaston got his, falling into the gorge of doom. I totally forgot that he dies, nice one Disney.

Belle loves the Beast.....is it enough & in time to save him???? Well the weird lightshow may be signaling something exciting happening.

Now, we come to a difficult part, we're supposed to be super happy because the horrible beast is now a man, however the issue remains that the man is actually less attractive than the beast and..he really needs a haircut. This is just my opinion (and my sisters), but I kinda feel bad for Belle, although the Prince certainly will shed less.

And admittedly he seems much easier to like, embrace, at this point.

The castle is cured! Hell-beasts are now cherubs!

Questions:

Where did all these royal subjects come from? Were they the plates and furniture in the castle this whole time?

Did the townfolk wonder what happened to Gaston? I bet they didn't recover a body.

Time for Celine...

This movie doesn't end with a wedding, which is notable, as most of these genre tend too. Although they it is proclaimed that they will live happily ever after.

More questions:

So, the beast is really a prince, but a prince of what? The town didn't seem to know he existed, so can his monarchy really have that much say in the kingdom as it were?

Do you think most of the previously enchanted folks took off not long after the transformation? I mean they were trapped in a castle for like 10 years as household objects with very little free will.

I would get the hell out of there.

That was fun & very satisfying in the way that only Disney can be, thanks for reading.

I'm off to live happily ever after (for the evening at least).

M.

New poll up.

oh hellz yes..

2011-02-18T21:38:00.002-05:00

Adele.

album pre-ordered.

M.

This one goes out to the ones I love

2011-02-14T17:32:00.003-05:00

for valentines day, a post to my loved ones:

Mom&Dad: I love you for always supporting me, and teaching me that I could be whatever I wanted and you would be behind me. I love you for showing me how to be myself, to respect others and for giving me the confidence I needed to be in the world. I love you for getting us through the hard times, with humour and hugs, with the understanding that we would all stick together through whatever came next.

I love you for sitting with me through endless rounds of homework, hurt feelings, and frustration. I love you for working so hard just to make our lives better. Dad, thank you for how hard you work, all these years, harder than almost anyone I know. Mom, thank you for all the volunteer meetings, involvement in our schools and our friends. Thank you both for catching me when I fell, and putting me on the right track.

Thank you for toys, books, bikes, library trips, flea markets, dinners, lunches, breakfasts, all the snacks in between, movies, christmases, shoulders to cry on, endless kitchen supplies, packing & moving me a million times, birthdays, stories, songs (even Pink Floyd) and for thinking that I'm one (of two) of the most smart, funny, together, beautiful girls ever.

Thanks for knowing I needed a sister, I figured it out too eventually.

My sister: What can I say? I love you for knowing me better than anyone. I love your humour, you are one of the funniest people alive. I love you for understanding when I need to ramble, cry, scream, sit quietly and I love you for calling bullshit when necessary. I love that you can forgive me at my worst and remind me what my best looks like. I love that you know what I'm thinking, without a lot of explanation. I love your joy, your energy, your willingness to be who you are. I love that you are an adventurer and I love your warm heart.

Thank you for being my best friend, thank you for all the hugs, and movies, and chats and emails and phone calls and everything in between. I am so fortunate to be your sister.

My extended family: I'm so lucky to be loved by so many. I love each of the unique things you bring to my life. I love knowing how much support I have, thank you for expressing your pride in me. Thank you for all the drives, moves, cards, birthdays and holidays. Thank you for being my teachers and as an adult, my friends. I would be who I am today without all of you.

Thanks for showing me what family can really mean and for being in my corner.

My hometown friends: Getting through being a tween, and a teen is not the easiest of tasks, and I never would have been able to do it without you. I love your acceptance of my many flaws, and for giving me a kick in the butt when I need it. I love you for always having the time to talk, or to wonder how I am. Thank you for putting up all the versions of me that you have encountered over the years and for still being there, even after all my moves and changes.

Thank you for showing me the true power of friendship and for being a community of people that allows me to feel loved and appreciated. There is too much to thank you for here, just know that I love ya'll.

To all my friends from my time in Hamilton, Guelph, London, Ottawa, Montreal, and all the places in between, whether we were roommates, housemates, classmates, co-workers (desks, cubes, office or libraries apart), or co-wanders through life, you have all supported me, laughed with me, cried with me, lunched with me, collaborated with me, drank tea with me, and made my life lovely.

I've been so lucky with the family that I was given, and I have been exceptionally fortunate to find friends who wanted to join me in the ups and downs of life.

I can't possibly name everyone, but please know I love and appreciate you all.

To my readers: Thanks for sticking around, I love that you read, comment, vote and miss me when I'm absent. Thank you for the blog love.

Thanks for standing by me.

Much love,
Michelle

Single in February

2011-02-09T23:17:00.004-05:00

VD Post Two:

ShimmerShine and I were talking about various holidays and their traditions (unicorns love traditions), and a thought struck us...why isn't Valentine's Day a cash holiday?

I mean, if we have to go through this every year, why not make it worthwhile?

After about 5 minutes of plotting, we had a very clear thesis.

VD: The New Plan

Cash from couples, for single people. Simple. Elegant.

(**It's not that I don't love and respect my coupled friends, I do, but this is Valentine's day, it's every blogger for themselves)

How would this payment plan work?

All year long singles are surrounded by coupledom, and it comes to a fever pitch on VD.

So, why not keep track and get our just desserts on Feb 14th.

Trying to take a walk and that couple in the park is holding hands & strolling slowly in front of you? Go get your toonie!

Giggling couple making out on the metro/subway/bus/train right next to you? That's $10 in your pocket.

Couples all around you in a restaurant, enjoying romantic candle-lit white table-clothed supper while you are just trying to read your book? They're about to pay for your dinner.

Can you hear your neighbours getting it on through your thin walls? No worries, just turn up the tv and think about how you're going to spend that 50 bucks they now owe you.

Get on this Hallmark.

Love & kisses,

M.

countdown to vd

2011-01-31T20:30:00.003-05:00

valentine's day is coming. nothing can be done.

so, I'm gonna have a count down to the day by telling you about the ridiculous things I observe that are related to valentines.

VD Post One:

From my email today - Give iPad this Valentines day. "They'll fall in love again and again. This Valentine's Day, give the one and only iPad."

The cheapest iPad is $549.00.

I mean, I'm not saying that I would turn down an iPad as a gift on a manufactured holiday, but...valentine's day...really?

Like, springing for dinner is the usual...can you imagine getting an iPad as a surprise valentine's gift, as you hand over your 4 dollar hallmark card and box of Pot of Gold?

(I also will never turn down Pot of Gold, it's a solid gift.)

Oh Apple...we wish we knew how to quit you.

M.

desk set

2011-01-24T22:30:00.012-05:00

I don't write about work much on the ol' blog, it's just not the right place for it. Anyway, in lieu of you reading about my work, I figured I could give you a peak...

*

Poll results, Toddlers & Tiaras won, and I've already live-blogged it! Because Jersey Shore came in second, I may still live blog that one for ya, if I can manage to watch an entire episode.

New poll up.

*

Dateline 3pm this afternoon:

I always think that a donut is a good idea, until I eat one, and then I realize it isn't.

*

Did anyone else have a big box or container of dress up clothes as a kid that they called the 'tickle trunk'?

*

My sister got me moccasins for Christmas they have been keeping my feet toasty warm during this particular 'cold snap':

I dunno if you can tell, but those daisies are beaded! so awesome! Thanks K!

*

Storytime!

Sometimes, the universe gives you signs that perhaps you don’t quite fit in and maybe you should cut your loses and move on, and sometimes you listen. But other times, you don't...

I was out, shopping on Sunday and decided to go into an unnamed woman’s clothing store that I’d never been in before. They were having a sale and some of the stuff in their window looked cute, so I figured, what the heck?

I should’ve known better when I saw the tiniest girl in the city of Montreal walk out of the dressing room, exclaiming, “I look so fat!”

I should’ve known better when I couldn’t find a non-mini skirt.

But, the moment I definitely should’ve known I was defeated, was in the change room, attempting to navigate a very complicated sweater, I heard it…a Ke$ha song.

I should’ve dumped all those clothes on the ground and run into the safety of the mall, but, I kept at it.

Nothing fit, (even though it was allegedly my size) and it all sat very oddly.

And then I got stuck in a blouse.

Okay universe, next time, I’ll listen.

Toddlers & Tiaras- Live Blog

2011-01-21T23:53:00.008-05:00

It’s go time.

The setup: I do, in fact, watch this show on a semi-regular basis, so in light of that fact, and that I saw T&T was winning the poll, I took some notes during my regular viewing, so I’d have a live blog for ya. YOU'RE WELCOME.

For the non-watchers: Every week, we follow a set of little girls (sometimes boys, no, really) and their parents, as they prepare for, enter and occasionally win, child beauty pageants.

Again, an explanation for the uninitiated, there are two types of these pageants: “natural” which means the contestant (typically wears minimal makeup, only her own hair, no false teeth, no spray tan, and unmanicured nails) or “high glitz” which means, they do have all that crap and more!

Parents spend thousands on these pageants “to make their kids happy” aka to fulfill their own unrequited dreams of stardom through their unsuspecting children.

The kids sometimes win money, but most of the parents just invest it back into dresses (which cost hundreds), professional hair, makeup, & spray tan and coaching in modeling, & “talent”.

Also, most of these kids are brats, hence they make it on the show.

Wow, I know a lot about that, off the top of my head..ah well, Away we go.

THIS WEEK: Viva Las Vegas Gold Coast Pageant: featuring “Vegas Wow Wear” (which by the previews appears to mean dressing up like mini showgirls, I’m sure we’ll have more on that later)– this is very much a glitz pageant.

MiniBeautyQueen1 Cassidy: not a fan of practicing, mouths off quite a bit and has ‘behavior issues’ due to ADHD, according to her Mom (thanks for the info)

Mom: “She’s sassy!” and since the meds, “she doesn’t beat up inanimate objects anymore”! Clearly this is a future miss congeniality.

MiniBeautyQueen2 Kiara and Mom Kyle: The child appears to be tone deaf. She is new to pageants; they are having a bake sale to raise money for the pageant; mmm cupcakes.

Do you think the little girl is allowed to have cupcakes? Now, I want a cupcake.

Those must be good cupcakes; they earned 60 bucks! Now I want to have a bake sale instead.

MiniBeautyQueen3 Ellisyn: is trying on her new ‘flippers’

(these are fake teeth that the contestants wear, cause you know, they are still losing their own teeth, BECAUSE THEY’RE KIDS)

and she has a pageant Dad**, and he’s in the airforce. His wife’s name is Barbie. True.story.

**A pageant Dad or P.Dad is a very special breed of parent on this show, usually completely manly and usually approaches pageants as hard-core competition, will occasionally be pushier than the Moms, and if we are very very lucky, will help choreograph ‘talent’ or demo proper runway modeling.

Everybody has talent! (or they have been convinced of such)

MBQ1 Cassidy is off to see her acting teacher; she would like to make horror movies. She’s a good screamer.

MBQ2 Kiara is at dance, her Mom thought it would be beneficial since they “live in the hood.” The dance studio seems like a pretty positive environment actually. (that is very odd for this show, will keep an eye on this situation)

P. Dad is taking MBQ 3 Elli to get her nails done, she wanted to get a pedi with flowers and is pretty upset that she can’t get what she wants.

She is “a diva” & “Daddy’s little girl”, therefore turning on the tears = flowers on her toes. Good lesson.

MBQ1 Cassidy got a casting call, to star in a horror movie as a possessed demon child. Goood…times?

MBQ3 Elli’s mom: “beauty does get you ahead in the world” ...ah she is a former beauty queen, now it's all coming together.

Dress time

Elli’s glitz outfit: a hotrod dress with flames.

MBQ2 Kiara’s family is on a budget and glitz up their own dresses. They’re going to rent a dress. (*this is very fiscally responsible, seriously, I may even like this family)

MBQ3 Ellie is giving her grandma and aunts a makeover they act as her “sponsors” aka they are the money.

MBQ 1 Cassidy’s Mom – “I go as far as spending every last penny I have to buy her a dress.” This seems like bad decision making, but hey, I’m not a parent.

The pageant will feature:

Formal Wear

Vegas Wow Wear

“Talent”

Judge Predictions

Kiara – will shine in talent

Ellisyn – the one to watch

Cassidy – “well…are the meds working?”

Beauty Time

MBQ1 Cassidy is getting spray tanned, & NOT A FAN OF THE DRYING PORTION finishes but then comes back to get a touch-up, Mom makes her get dried with the hair dryer and so Cassidy says: “What other promises are you gonna break??”

Maybe the one where you get to play ever again. **(that may have been Michelle’s response and not Cassidy’s Mom)

MBQ2 Ellie is also getting spray tanned.

(For those unfamiliar , spray tan is literally spraying chemicals on the body to fake a tan, although usually it just causes one to look like an oompa loompa, true story)

MBQ3 Kiara – hair & makeup are FULL GLITZ

Cassidy wants to wear her pink dress, her Mum wants her to wear the blue THIS IS THE DRAMA OF PAGEANTS!

Cassidy certainly has a mouth on her.

MBQ2 Elli gets coffee on pageant mornings,. Ellie is 5. (insert your own comments here)

P. Dad does Ellie’s nails and helps her with her flipper. He’s in it to win it.

OH GOD CASSIDY GOT A PAPER CUT! That definitely justifies a catatonic fit. Mom bought her candy though, so she decided to calm down.

Um, wtf, I get paper cuts all the time, I’m a librarian! No one ever gives me any damn candy, that’s it, next time, I’m crawling under my desk and crying until someone brings me a Snickers.

First up on stage: 0 to 3 years. Yes, 0 years.

Next: 4-5 year olds, P. Dad is having a fit, he seems more nervous than his daughter.

MBQ2 Ellisyn is up, they do a before and after splitscreen, which I always enjoy, since the little girls look like actual dolls, it’s way creeptastic.

MBQ3 Kiara is doing a weird chest & tummy puffing out thing during her walk..ah..one of the judges thinks she needs a modeling coach.

MBQ1 Cassidy – beauty: we’re still on the dress controversy, but she’s up,

Cassidy made her Mom wear bunny ears…so she looks stupid. And she does.

Geez, there is an eight year old who looks 17…she is Cassidy’s biggest competition.

Cassidy’s dress, not a hit with the judges…guess Mom was right afterall!

VEGAS WOW WEAR – so many babies dressed as showgirls, do we think this is a good idea?

Do ya’ll remember what pretending to be a showgirl did to poor Jesse Spano from Bayside???

MBQ2 Ellisyn, is dressed as a hard rock/hot rod girl (I guess that’s a bit better, but encouraging illegal road racing also seems slightly inappropriate)

MBQ3 Kiara – western wear, with FRINGED PANTS, I think I should get some pink fringed pants to wear at the library.

MBQ1 Cassidy’s meds are wearing off, apparently, she is also a showgirl and so is her main competition Lindsay, dun dun dahhhhhhhh!

MBQ1 Cassidy only forgot a couple moves, so we’re happy with that performance.

Oh here comes Talent:

MBQ2 Ellisyn is doing a dance routine, it’s cute enough

MBQ3 Kiara is also dancing – a routine based on princess and the frog

**I happen to think that you could make a very effective & entertaining reality show by solely training the cameras on the parents during these dance and modeling competitions, they look insane.

MBQ1 Cassidy is being very ‘diva-like’ and is doing a magic show, oh TERROR, she is not the only one!!! She also isn’t smiling very much, or, at all. [That douche Criss Angel never smiles either, think about that...]

My talent would be a dramatic reading of my blog.

Awards- the highest title is HIGH POINT WINNER and you get $500!

Things you could spend 500 dollars on:

a new refrigerator

a strangely named sofa from Ikea

a fancy tv

an ipad

MBQ2 Ellisyn is racking up the wins (beauty, pretty face, etc), including high point winner for her section, and is up for the big prize.

MBQ3 Kiara won 2^nd runner up for talent.

MBQ1 Cassidy always places for talent but DID NOT TODAY. She is unhappy about this. Her Mom is unhappy about this. Lindsay is cleaning up over Cassidy.

Cassidy “wins” 4^th runner up.

OVERALL HIGHPOINT WINNER: ELLISYN! She gets a giant crown and 500 big ones to spend...on another pageant.

Parting philosophical rumination from a pageant parent: “Competition is good for the soul.”

In the end, I think we all won.

Best Jazz Hands, Ms. Polite Disdain & Fluffiest Cardigan - Viva Gold Sparkles Librarian Pageant 2011

i'm alive, i even wrote a blog post

2011-01-10T21:07:00.016-05:00

My new cardi was quite the hit.

A sample of some of the comments:

"I like your embellishments." (..er..I hope that was about my sweater..)

"So is that look, like, popular right now?"

"That's so..fluffy."

Well, I like it.

**

Hey IGA, you know what policy kinda sucks? Not helping customers pack their groceries if they bring their own bags, to....you know, save the earth.

**

Some questions from the grocery store.

Why does my grocery store constantly give out free yogurt with the purchase of...yogurt? I mean, I like it, but I already have so much.

What hell are they feeding chickens that makes them cost approximately $500 per pound?

How come ice cream comes in such giant tubs, and why are all the little pints like double the price? I can't eat that much ice cream! I live alone! It will get freezer burned! disaster!

Why is peanut butter so expensive? Is it because Mr. Peanut wears a top hat?

What is the difference between the white cauliflower and the green/orange/purple cauliflower, like do they taste different? Does the green kind taste like broccoli? Does the purple one taste like grape?

**

Whoa...I still have a Christmas poll up. yikes.

Well, our winner for most annoying Christmas song: Wonderful Christmastime

Now we know.

My vote will always be with 'Santa Baby', always, terrible.

**

I was gonna do a post with a few Christmas gifts, but they've changed the picture uploader on blogger and I will admit, I pretty much hate it. So, no photos for now.

I'm such a cranky Luddite eh?

However, check out my new space-age tea technology: The Tea Master awesome.

**

So, ShimmerShine and I are valiantly taking on the burden of watching 'The Bachelor', we've endured 2 episodes thus far, and may I just say, it is way more horrifying than 'The Bachelorette'.

I mean, we knew from our viewing of 'The Bachelorette' that being single is the absolute worst thing to befall a woman in this day and age.

But man, does the Bachelor ever run with that idea.

My personal favourite moment from our initial viewings, has been when the bachelor himself (who has been on the show one time before and failed to find love) explained that after the first time, he was so incredibly distraught that he 'couldn't even work for 5 months.'

Really guy? You didn't work for 5 months and you think this is an attractive thing to admit to a lady in order to convince her to marry you?

No wonder he's single.

If we make it through any more episodes, I'm sure there will be more fodder for posts. So, stay tuned.

**

Poll up, to help me with my writers block.

**

M.

metal detectors & Christmas carols

2010-11-27T15:30:00.000-05:00

I took the Greyhound from Ottawa to Montreal a couple weeks ago.

As usual, there were security guards waiting to search us before we got on the bus. They normally search through your bags quickly and let you on.

This time, they had those hand-held metal detectors, had everyone empty their pockets and waved the wand over each passenger....& then let us go on our merry way.

So, they metal detected us, but didn't even glance in our bags.

This doesn't seem logical to me, I mean..if I were hiding, say...a broadsword or ninja stars, I'd probably put them in my bag...which I am allowed to take on the bus with me.

Luckily, I did not have any ninja-grade weapons but, I had rearranged the contents of my bag to ensure my bra wouldn't fall out as soon as I opened it..

...because I assumed with the heightened security, that they would search bags.

Now, I also don't think it makes sense to just search bags and not people, which is what they had been doing before this trip.

It just seems all so half-hearted. I feel like it will detect only about 50% of all ninja activity on buses.

Granted I don't think they need to take it to American airport level standards..that would just be loony.

Oh Greyhound, keep up that corporate motto: "Travel Greyhound..it's sorta okay, most of the time."

**

I started listening to Christmas music yesterday.

I made a little playlist of favourites on Grooveshark for work.

Selecting my favourite Christmas songs was pretty fun, they are a variety of classic carols, movie & cartoons songs, all terribly festive.

I guess my top three would be:
All I want for Christmas is You - I really like the Mariah Carey, but the Olivia Olsen version from an excellent christmas movie, Love Actually
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas - Judy Garland, is sweet & sad, from Meet Me In St. Louis
The Christmas Song - Nat King Cole version

Honorable Mentions:

Little Drummer Boy - Bing Crosby & David Bowie
Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) - U2 version
Oh Holy Night - multiple versions, Josh Groban is good, Glee did a version, even Mariah brings it

So, aside from my apparent love for the Mariah Carey Christmas album, we can see that my tastes are diverse in the Christmas music area.

My question to you in my poll is: What is the most annoying Christmas song?

(I have not linked videos of these, you may google them if you feel you need samples.)

**
M.

my pet dragon

2010-11-15T22:26:00.007-05:00

I just finished Nick Hornby's newest book, Juliet, Naked, it's about relationships and the adults in them deciding if they still like each other or not. It was a good read.

I decided that my next book ought to be a classic (I like to mix it up) and so I'm taking on Wuthering Heights once again.

I hated this book in high school. I felt like everyone in it was pretty loathsome. My English teacher told me:

"Read it when you're older and I promise you, you'll like it."

And so, here I go.

*

I went to the opera on the weekend..well, okay, I went to the movies and saw an opera.

It was Don Pasquale, a bel canto comedy and it was one of the MET 'Live in HD' series, where you watch a live performance from New York at your local movie house. It was a pretty cool experience, complete with subtitles and backstage interviews.

The median age of the audience was significantly older than myself my opera companion. And therefore the lines for the bathroom during the intermission were substantial. This is really my only complaint.

It's a great way to class up an afternoon.

*
So, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows: Part One, comes out this Friday....I AM SO EXCITED!

that is all.

*

Exotic Ultimate Pet Showdown Winner:

Dragon! (with 7)

Really? I mean I get that it's kinda cool, but there are some impracticalities to consider, first a dragon goes to be rather large, and is usually fire-breathing, it might ruin your stuff. Also, what would you feed it? You would probably need to keep livestock handy as snacks.

I don't want to rain on anyone's parade..but these things have to be said. ;)

In second, not a close second, was the Helper Monkey (with 2).

This is a much more practical choice...my helper monkey would do a lot of dishes & possibly make me lunches.

Other honorable mentions go to:

a hobbit - does anyone know what they eat?
a sexy vampire, like Edward or Eric - especially practical if you're not a morning person
Nathan Fillion - a fine choice, very fine
Post Owl - cute and would cut down on your stamp budget
(tamed) magic carpet - what are the safety features available?
a misfit toy, from the Island of Misfit Toys - they need love too!

*

I put up my Christmas tree, I'm getting all festive up in here. To borrow (steal) a theme from my sister's blog, here is setting up the tree:

The tiny pink tree is assembled. Bask in its glory.

Here she is mostly decorated, there is santa, a snowman, a gingerbread man, a mitten..etc.

Here I am putting the crowning decoration on the top, it's Max the Grinch's dog/reindeer.

Ta Da! Festive!

***

Cheers, M.

monday, monday

2010-11-08T21:44:00.002-05:00

A little behind in the times on the ol' poll results...

What is the majority of my reader's favourite part of Halloween?

Discounted candy, the day after.. (with 8 folks)

-> Agreed, I had to go to 2 stores before I found something decent on November 1st, but I managed to get some Smarties, Swedish Berries, and Lindt Ghost Truffles (white & milk chocolate).

in second:

Roasting pumpkin seeds (with 5 roasters) ... again, agreed, however I had no pumpkin, so no seeds.

in third:

sweet sweet candy! & Everything available in mini sizes!

-> These are very enjoyable features.

also getting votes:

The kids having fun/dressing up/trick or treating, Pumpkin carving!, Dressing up/wearing a costume, Halloween episodes on tv, I don't do and/or enjoy Halloween in any way.,

Haunted houses/walks/hayrides/mazes, All the decorations!, Halloween parties!,

Scary movies, & Rocky Horror parties/viewings/on cable.

I'm glad to say, raisins did not make the list. huzzah!

*

new poll up.

*

the truth shall set you free, right?

well, I just ate a frosted strawberry pop tart. I am 29 years old.

*

and that's about all she wrote.

M.

Halloweenie

2010-10-31T14:12:00.006-04:00

I'm not doing much..or anything really for Halloween this year. I haven't for quite some time.

It's not that I don't like it, I'm just not a bar person and I don't have much in the way of costume materials in my wardrobe.

So, here are a few Halloween memories of youth, for ya'll (or just for my Mom, either way).

Dad & his inner child

The first thing to understand about our family Halloween is that my Dad LOVEs the holiday, probably more than us kids ever did.

The opportunity to get dressed up and possibly scare people, my Dad is definitely on that.

He used to buy a mask, or put together a costume of some kind to take us out trick-or-treating. Or terrify us initially, but we got over it.

He would be pretty excited, which helped lift our spirits when it was below zero and we had to wear our winter coats over our costumes. (didn't you HATE that?)

Our costumes were usually a homemade affair, a few of my highlights over the years:

A bad witch (with the black hat, etc)
A princess (with a crown, and scepter, which was a baton, filled with water & gold sparkles)
A gypsy
Glinda, the Good Witch of the North (my Mom made the tall pink crown for me)
A pioneer girl (dress, bonnet, apron) - this was a former costume of my Mom's when she was little
A bunny
A hippie

Holiday Prep

My Mom used to work so hard putting together our costumes, sewing orange & green witch hair onto a black hat and/or working a large piece of Bristol board, pink cellophane and tin foil stars into a Glinda hat.

We also took our pumpkin very seriously. My sister and I would go out with our Dad to pick out the perfect pumpkin, the bigger the better really.

And then the carving would begin at home, in the living room, newspapers spread all over the floor.

My Mom wanted nothing to do with this, it was messy work.

We would figure out what we wanted the face to look like, and my Dad would make the first incisions.

My sister and I scooped out the insides and directed our Dad how to finish off the face.

Our pumpkin usually had a set of floating pupils, my Dad got this idea from Mr. Wizard (remember mr. wizard!?!) and fashioned wires inside.

When it was all set, we would light it up and put in the front door, with a few other decorations

(although not the Holiday Extravaganza that our door at Christmas looks like, it still held its own).

Costumes on Display

When we were very young, there was a Halloween gathering at our local Drop In Center (this wasn't a daycare, you went with your parents), we spent a lot of time there as kids, there were lots of toys to and other kids to hang out with.

They'd have things like apple bobbing (which in retrospect seems super gross and very germy) and other Halloween festivities.

When we were older there was the traditional Halloween parade at school, all the parents would come to take pictures and we got to eat candy, in CLASS!

Halloween night, we would go out in our building with my Dad, and although we would've had a nice haul from just trick-or-treating in our large apartment, we usually went up the street to what my sister and I like to refer to as, 'the rich houses'.

When you're a working class kid, growing up in an apartment, large family homes look like mansions!

Anyway, we knew these were the money houses, they gave out FULL-SIZED CHOCOLATE BARS.

The worst part of trick-or-treating is when you got some jackass at their door who asked for a trick. What the hell! As kids you are shy and scared to even say 'trick-or-treat' and then someone wants you to do a song and dance to get the candy??

My sister and I would usually just go silent when this would happen...holding our bags open in anticipation. Yeah buddy, that's what you get.

We also always collected pennies for UNICEF, in those little orange boxes.

There was someone in our building, who was never home Halloween night, but always left a big bucket of pennies in their front door for the UNICEF collection, I always recall this as being a nice touch.

Checking out our spoils

One of the best parts of Halloween was to sit with my sister after trick-or-treating and see what our take was.

This was partially so we could trade for things we didn't like, and so our parents could check our candy...on account of all the media speculation around razorblades in apples and poisoned treats.

We couldn't have anything that was open, unless it was from someone my parents knew well, and nothing that seemed to be tampered with.

So, my sister and I would come in after trick-or-treating, take off most of our costumes sit on the floor and dump out our bags.

Things would be organized into piles:

Tampered/Open candy (or the 'garbage' pile)

And then categorized:

Chocolate Bars
Chips
Suckers
Candies
Rockets/Candy Necklaces
Twizzlers
Nuts
Pop
Gum
Other (toothbrushes from the hygienist in the building)
and...Dad.

The Dad pile included such highlights as: boxes of raisins, those brown taffy candies in the halloween paper (does anyone except Dads like these?) and anything involving black licorice.

My sister and I, would then go about the important work of Trades. (always one for one, and there was usually some negotiation)

Then when all was organized my Mom would give us tins to store it in with the plea, "don't eat it all tonight!!"

Mom also got every Coffee Crisp bar (ewwwww coffee) and some Rockets/Sweet Tarts, her favourite.

The Aftermath

My candy stores always lasted longer than my sisters.

She would get jealous and try to score some of my supply, as I recall, I was usually pretty stingy and difficult about this issue.

Mom would usually get some discounted candies in the days following, to supplement what we had, and in reality, to ensure that she and my Dad had a few treats as well...beyond the delicious raisins & coffee crisp.

Too old for Halloween

I kind wish I could still trick-or-treat, because really that is the best part about Halloween and I'm sure my sister and I would have much more pleasant & civil negotiations, now that we're more mature...well...maybe. ;)

M.

sunday reverie

2010-10-24T22:55:00.000-04:00

Has anyone done empirical research to determine if watching more than one episode of America's Next Top Model at a time is a detriment to healthy brain function?

Because...I may or may not have been effected.

But I do feel a bit more fierce...well maybe...I can at least smile with my eyes, with some effort.

**

HolidayWatch 2010:

Oct 19th

Glade holiday scents commercials on tv..

Christmas trees, fully lit and decorated, on display in Ogilvy

**

Slightly more seasonal halloween watch 2010:

Do you want to see something really scary for Halloween?

Swing by your local American Apparel and check out their 'costume' display..yikes.

364 days a year I don't wear catsuits as part of my wardrobe; I am not making an exception for Halloween.

**

Everyone's (or the majority of you..) decided that your favourite dystopian/end-of-the-world/post apocalyptic film is:

Independence Day! (menace: Aliens) Ha, I think this is hilarious and fantastic.

Runner up for number two is: Armageddon! (menace: meteor, space dementia) Even more hilarious as the hero role goes from Will Smith to Ben Affleck...

And in our number 3 spot is: Wall*e (menace: people who refuse to recycle), I'm getting the sense that my readers like a happy ending.

We have Zombieland tied for 4th...a fine zombie film, very funny actually, worth a rental, with The Day After Tomorrow (which features scenes from a frozen NYPL)

And then a tied for 5th (with 2 votes each):

Dr. Strangelove (menace: the bomb), Mad Max(s) (menace: Mel Gibson), WarGames (menace: supercomputer), Deep Impact (menace: Big meteor), The Matrix(s) (menace: superduper computers) , I Am Legend (menace: vampirey monstery things), Shaun of the Dead (menace: zombies), The End of the World (menace: the bomb(s))

I'm not sad, I just like the genre, it's all good.

One vote each, they stand alone:

Children of Men (menace: humankind, babies), Last Night (menace: unknown), Terminator(s) (menace: robots, bombs, humans), 1984 (menace: Big Brother), Logan's Run (menace: turning 30), 2001 (menace: computers...or something, I've always been unclear on that..), The Road (menace: people)

Thanks for your votes.

**

New poll up.

**

I re-reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows before the movie comes out in November. It's kinda fun and I am finding that I don't really remember at least half of what happens in the book.

I know this is a result of the first time I read it, was in slightly less than 48 hours one weekend, after I had obtained my copy at a midnight Harry Potter party at the local mega book emporium.

I was in library school and went with a small group of my classmates (and met up with plenty more while we were there).

I knew I had to finish it before I went back to class on Monday, because these were other librarians and guaranteed many, if not most of them would be doing the same thing and shall not be spoiled!!!

I really will be sad when there are no more movies to come, I do love the characters and their wizarding world.

**

They finished the hallways in my building, it looks super classy now...I hope the rent doesn't increase.

**

Going to see a movie called "Back to the Future" tomorrow in the theater, it seems to have pretty good buzz, I'll be sure to let you know what I think of it.

**

I'm your density. I mean... your destiny. M.

chapters about chapters

2010-10-17T13:25:00.006-04:00

So, I was in a particular mega-super-book-establishment recently...

(I like to hang out out in these stores, with a hot beverage, browsing at what is new in the print world)

...and I had to pause mid-browse when I spotted them: Christmas cards.

I think I'm going to take a seasonal tally, and keep track of when/where I see the 'signs of the season', as currently there are both christmas cards on some racks and halloween decorations down the next aisle.

Seasonal Tally:

Spotted Oct 16th: Christmas cards in Chapters

*

I've decided to narrate some highlights of my trip to Chapters, because I never did deliver on that 'trip to the mall' post.

Deal Hunting:

As I walk in, I see the staff handing out flyers to some of the shoppers, in between browsing, I smile at couple employees and yet no one produces what I assume to be a crazy sale/deal for me to apply to my theoretical purchase.

What gives?

I'm looking at books, yes I'm wearing an ipod, but I made eye contact! TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DEALS!

Teatime:

Frustrated I travel upstairs to purchase a tea, because although I suppose you could browse at books without a hot beverage in hand, why would you ever want to do that?

Downtown + ice hockey + yuppie coffee = long lines

I wait in line, place my order, it's pretty busy and there are quite a few customers in Habs jerseys...I hear a barrista ask about the game..it's tonight? It starts in an hour?

Relief spreads across their faces..the pre-hockey crowd will clear out soon.

Committed to the economy:

Armed with a beverage, I find my way to Fiction...finally I am given the deal flyer..I think the beverage showed my commitment, I'm in for the evening folks, I will look at every deal in your store!

Emboldened with my new sense of purpose (percentages off! discounts to be had!) I find Mr. Coupland's new book and look into the new Nick Hornby title...

Curiosity...:

I think, "I've been hearing/reading a lot about these 'Hunger Games' books, I might like to flip through a copy"...and so I make my way to the YA section, momentarily sidetracked by all the Glee merchandise...I attempt to find Book One.

I see Catching Fire (book two) and Mockingjay (book three) and the sealed box set, but the first book seems be be awol...

Born stubborn:

After much I'm-a-librarian-and-I-can-find-books-myself-thanks fueled (& fruitless) searching, I break down and ask for help.

Trendy:

I've apparently hit this trend exactly at the same time as everyone else and there are very few copies to be had..

Personal library, refreshed:

I left with a couple very well discounted purchases (nothing from the Glee table, I promise) and a much better idea of this whole Hunger Games series...

(which I will likely read sometime in the near future, when there is a copy to be borrowed, at the very least).

*

the arrangement of my living:

They appear to have nearly finished renovating the hallways in my building.

They've tiled, painted, put up molding, put up new wallpaper, installed new lights over each door...we just need the new flooring, which I believe will be a carpet.

It all looks quite nice, however, there used to be one of those long tube lights above my door, and now there is a spot lighty kinda thing, that you might use to display art. (<-- illustrated here are a couple of very good reasons I can never work in a hardware store..)

It's a little freaky...now when I come home and go to open my door, it feels like I should be reciting a soliloquy or perhaps singing a solo (and no one wants that...trust.)

It makes my entrance way kinda mysterious, like...what will await you behind the door!?!

I mean, the answer is: a poorly stocked kitchen, a ten thousand year old tv, a slightly uncomfortable couch, a view of the alley & the whitest walls you've ever experienced...

...but still, there is a moment of Narnia-esque suspense now.

Is that the glow of an olde thymey lamp-post in the distance...???

(no, it's just my modem & router...but they do glow..)

*

M.

a post about the apocalypse, but not the 'post apocalypse'

2010-10-15T21:19:00.005-04:00

Internal dialogue: This is why you have a blog Michelle, to share these important ideas.

Good recently tweeted about Costco's new brand 'Thrive', a line of freeze dried food supplies for 'disaster planning' aka the end of the world aka the zombie apocalypse.

Now, as many of you know, my plan for the impending zombie onslaught is to barricade myself in (& defend) a Costco, or if the costco is too far, one of those Super Wal-Marts.

This plays into my grand plans perfectly. (except I'm not a member, but I figure different rules will apply when the undead are in the neighbourhood, no worries)

Thrive has a 6 month 'Shelf Reliance' supply of freeze dried & dehydrated food...

Or, if you think perhaps, there is a chance that you may be trapped with your family while the zombie hoard ravages our cities, there is the Premium 1 year, 4 person "Shelf Reliance" supply, for only $3500 (US) you can have piece of mind!

Perhaps you already have a well-stocked living-dead-proof pantry, but you're worried about missing those little luxuries, well don't despair!

Thrive has both a Premium Cheese Pack & a Baking Essentials Pack ...mmm, nothing like freeze dried cheese!

I feel safer already.

*

I also just read a review about Douglas Coupland's new book 'Player One'. It's also about the end of the world. Although it does not appear to be about zombies. No book is perfect.

I'm a big fan of the apocalyptic, post-apocalyptic, dystopian genre in my entertainment options.

I am jazzed to get my hands on this book, I love Coupland's writing and I'm sure he has much to say about how we silly humans might react, in the End.

Addendum: After posting on this uplifting subject matter, I read a post from JamesKingsley, pointing to Douglas Coupland's 'Radical Pessimists Guide to the Next 10 Years', which compliments my theme quite nicely.

*reading the guide* Oh! I live near a subway stop! Awwww...I don't know how to make jam...

*

The film version of Never Let Me Go has just come to theaters.

It's not about the end of the world, but it is a dystopian story.

I loved the book, written by Kazuo Ishiguro, who also wrote Remains of the Day. It is bleak and haunting. I don't think I can bring myself to actually see the movie.

It's not as if there isn't decent buzz about it, and it has some talented actors in the cast (Keira Knightly and Carey Mulligan), but I'm so afraid they won't treat the story just right..the way it unfolds and stays with you is one of the most striking things about the book.

So, if you see one movie this year, make it Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Part One and give Never Let Me Go a read instead.

Also, reading The Remains of the Day is a good idea too, or see the movie with Anthony Hopkins and Emma Thompson, it's lovely and heartbreaking.

*

New poll up.

*

The End (of the post...not the world...I'm off to google map a costco...)

M.

13 octobre

2010-10-13T20:55:00.004-04:00

So, I had a very lofty plan to buy the Beauty & the Beast dvd...

... watch it (with much joy & glee), enjoy the special features (yeah, I'm That person) and have the songs in my head for DAYS.

Alas, I was foiled.

I went off to my local Music/Movie/General Entertainment Emporium.

Browsed around a bit to see the sales.

Then headed to the large Beauty & the Beast display to pick up a copy.

Puzzled, I noted there was a DVD and a Blue Ray. However, the DVD came with Blue Rays...why would this be???

I checked around and it looked as if these were the only copies, I then asked a friendly employee for help.

She explained that this was a ComboPack, which means it comes with one DVD of the film, a Blue Ray of the film and a Blue Ray of the features.

I asked if a regular DVD would be coming out...Yes, in November: 2 discs...I asked if it would be cheaper...Yes, it will be...I asked if the special features were Only available on the Blue Ray in this particular 'combo'. Yep.

So, instead of getting ripped off and having useless Blue Rays and no way to watch special features, I put off purchasing the DVD until November.

I saved money and was not made a fool so that's good, but I didn't get to watch Beauty & the Beast, that's bad. Michelle angry!

Stay tuned to this blog for my joyful announcement of a DVD acquired at a later date, and if you're lucky, a live blog of my inaugural viewing of this Disney classic!

**

Speaking of...

The post 1989 Disney classic that most of my readers have missed is:

Treasure Planet (with 10)

Plot: Treasure Island in space.

Voice talents: Joseph Gordon-Levitt, David Hyde Pierce, Martin Short, Emma Thompson

In second:

The Princess and the Frog (with 8)

Plot: The Princess and the Frog, in New Orleans.

Voice talents: Oprah! John Goodman, Terrence Howard

In third:

The Rescuers Down Under (with 7)

Plot: Miss Bianca and Bernard, race to Australia to save a boy and a rare golden eagle from a murderous poacher (from IMDB)

Voice talents: Bob Newhart, Eva Gabor, John Candy

As I had surmised, all of my blog readers have seen the 'biggies': Little Mermaid, Beauty & the Beast, Aladdin, and The Lion King.

**

2 stories about how old I look:

1. I got a haircut the other day, at a new salon. The hairdresser, during his chit chat with me asked if I went to school.

I told him I worked at a school. He stopped cutting my hair, and said "NOOOO...you're 21! 22! Max!" I explained that no, I was old enough to work at a university, because I was, in fact, 29.

He paused and then said, "well congratulations, you don't look it."

2. Today I was working on the reference desk. A couple of students approached me and asked about a project.

Then one of them recognized me and told his friend "Oh, we can totally ask her questions, she's the Head Librarian."

I stopped him there, and said actually I wasn't..he explained that I had given a library workshop for his class recently, I responded that I was the librarian for his subject.

"Oh so you're not in charge of everything?"

Note to self: Today's outfit makes you look authoritative..maybe..or you look really tired and older..either way...

**

So, I gave myself food poisoning.

I did not do this on purpose, I bought groceries and made dinner, then felt like hell directly afterwards and on into the evening.

I cooked and stored everything properly but alas, something wasn't right.

I clearly need someone to take care of me, I am formulating a new personal ad headline now:

Like to cook? And sarcastic brunettes? Date me & save a life (or at least put an end to terrible indigestion)

**

I just found these 30 Rock & Glee metasites ('Obsessive Guides') and they are pretty cool, so if you're a fan, you may want to check them out:

Vulture: 30 Rock

Vulture: Glee

**

Speaking of 30 Rock...love Tracey Jordan? Think Kanye West is ridiculous?

Then you'll love @kanyejordan on twitter.

Basically, this is a bot, who takes all of Kanye's tweets and tacks 'Liz Lemon..' onto the front of them and it is literally like a mini 30 Rock scene unfolds before you on twitter.

For instance:

"Liz Lemon, Mosquitos suck"

"Liz Lemon, Yo being nice is my whole shit now"

goodtimes.

**

M.

Saturday afternoon

2010-09-25T19:00:00.017-04:00

Fishes!

I GOT SHOES!

I'M SUPER PASTY!

"The Body Shoe: Proven by university experts in Biomechanics to enhance walking efficiency." (true story, apparently)

friday evening..

2010-09-24T21:42:00.003-04:00

oh hey ya'll!

2010-09-18T14:30:00.001-04:00

Top five favourite teas

1. Genmaicha/Brown Rice Tea
2. Gunpowder Green Tea
3. Coconut Cream Chai
4. David's Coco Chai Rooibos
5. Tazo Zen Green Tea

Top five favourite sitcoms

1. 30 Rock
2. The Office (U.S.)
3. Arrested Development
4. How I Met Your Mother
5. The Simpsons

Top five favourite candies

1. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups
2. Swedish Berries
3. Peanut Butter M&M's
4. Junior Mints
5. Nerds (specifically Apple coated Watermelon / Lemonade coated Wild Cherry)

Top five favourite fashion-related tv shows

1. Project Runway/Catwalk (all the national versions, but esp U.S. with Heidi and Tim)
2. Fashion Television (with Jeanne Beker)
3. ANTM
4. What Not To Wear
5. Say Yes to the Dress

Top five things I am most likely to say in the course of a regular conversation (perhaps unfortunately)

1. Good times.
2. You know...
3. Whatever/whatevs
4. Alrighty
5. Sweet

Five Consumer Goods that I Lack, but would Like/Need

1. Black work shoes
2. A wrist watch
3. Black work pants
4. New jeans
5. Microwave

*

So one night last week I may or may not have watched 3 hours of wedding themed tv shows on TLC. That is a lot of wedding programming for someone who may never even get married.

*

I've been observing the undergrad fashion show and guess what?? Plaid & flannel are back! Yes everyone, it is Seattle 1991 all over again and this time...it's ironic!

*

Storytime!

I consider myself to be a pretty intelligent gal, I mean I'm no genius but I can hold my own in conversations generally, I can put together a sentence, I have to do quite a lot of thinking on my feet in my occupation, I mean, I'm no supermodel and have no discernible musical or artistic talents but I am confident that I have some smarts.

There's your context.

My vacuum broke, quite a while ago. I was very displeased by this, because it was a pretty good/nice vacuum and I have carpeting all through my apartment. I could not figure out what was wrong with it.

I checked the cord and all the gears, buttons, everything seemed fine. I cleaned the filter completely and checked the hose and this was very dusty work. I could not not find anything wrong.

Saddened, I put it away in the closet and started looking at replacements. I soon discovered that I couldn't afford a new vacuum, so I wondered should I get something little like a Shark just to pick up obvious stuff? Meanwhile, I was using a couple stop gap measures to keep things tidy in my apartment.

Fast forward a While (maybe days, maybe a couple months) to last night, I need to plug in my laptop and recharge a couple things.

So, I plug the laptop into a wall socket I don't use very often. Nothing. I switch the plug. Nothing.

I know my laptop is not broken, because if it was, I would have an emotional breakdown and "computer" wouldn't do that to me.

Suddenly, it comes to me...when was the last time I used this socket? For the vacuum. I only ever use this socket for the vacuum. And then I ask myself the most important question: when my vacuum broke did I try it in a different socket?

Nope.

My vacuum isn't broken, it was never broken, I blew a fuse in one socket.

I'm an idiot.

But I'm an idiot with a tidy floorspace.

*

Hey so, my sister who is a first time teacher, continuously prepping for classes and figuring out her new life, is kicking my ass in the blogging arena. She posts everyday! And it's funny! And interesting!

She gets the gold medal in blogging, but I maintain that I taught her everything she knows.

*
Disney poll is closed.

And the least familiar/least watched pre 1989 classic is:

The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad (with 9 votes) - stats: made 1949, narrated by Bing Crosby & Basil Rathbone, is comprised of 2 animated adaptations of Sleepy Hollow & The wind in the willows, it appears to be in the vault.

I've never seen it either.

Coming in tied for second are (with 6 votes each):

The Black Cauldron stats: made 1985, story: "A young boy and a bunch of misfit friends embark on a quest to find a dark magic item of ultimate power before a diabolical tyrant can."

I think maybe someone is trapped in the cauldron or IS the cauldron...I can't really be sure, the description makes it sound like Harry Potter actually.

I've never seen it. Not in the vault, anniversary edition available on amazon.

& The Great Mouse Detective stats: made 1986, voice actor: Vincent Price as Professor Ratigan!, story: "Basil, the rodent Sherlock Holmes, investigates the kidnapping of a toy-maker and uncovers its link to his archenemy, Professor Ratigan."

I have seen it (possibly in 1986) but I don't really remember much about it, not in the vault, available on amazon (Mystery in the Mist edition..I have no idea what this means).

In third we have Oliver and Company stats: made 1988, voice actors: Joey Lawrence (from Blossom!), Billy Joel (the Piano Man!), Dom DeLuise, Bette Midler and Cheech Marin! Story: Oliver Twist, only they're cats & dogs.

I did see it, but again do not recall it well. Does not appear to be in the vault.

The other unknowns include:

Bambi - yeah me either, but I'm pretty sure Bambi's mother gets shot and it's sad

The Aristocats - something about fancy cats..Eva Gabor lends her voice!

The Rescuers - two mice from the rescue society rescue a young girl from kidnappers, I love this movie! Again Eva Gabor and Bob Newhart!

The Fox and the Hound - Me either...I'm guessing there is both a fox..and a hound and they get into some kinda hi jinx.

Robin Hood - Never saw this one myself..I believe it's robin hood but with animals.

101 Dalmatians - there are dalmatians, LOTS of them, someone wants to make them into a coat, others think this is a bad idea (see The Simpsons: Two Dozen and One Greyhounds "See my Vest")

The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (based on a book)- a bear lives in a wood, with a sad donkey, hyperactive tiger, stressed out rabbit, smart owl, a cute piglet, a pair of kangaroos and hangs out with a little boy, getting into adventures, very cute, spawned tv series; Canadian connection.

Alice in Wonderland - See the Matrix.

Fantasia - classical music & animation; Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy ; Waltz of the Flowers ; The Sorcerer's Apprentice (with Mickey!)

*
New Poll.

this post is brought to you in part by Canada's dairy farmers, grocers, & sushi chefs

2010-09-08T23:35:00.005-04:00

Recent food shame: I bought strawberry pop-tarts at the grocery store, I think the lady in front of me in line judged me a little bit.

*

Heartbreaking cupcake tale:

I was in the grocery store last week, and in addition to ingredients for dinner, I thought I might buy myself a dessert.

So, I went to the treats/bakery section in investigate my options.

Up on the top shelf of pastries, were these boxes of 2 gourmet cupcakes from a local bakery, the icing was very fancy and they looked altogether appealing. They were also on sale.

So, I decided to do the rest of my shop and come back for them, so that the icing wouldn't get all messed up from the box banging around in my shopping basket.

I return at the end of my shop to find an older man also looking at the cupcakes.

This wouldn't be a problem, except that instead of taking the boxes off of the top shelf to see what flavours each set contained, he was flipping the boxes on their side to see in the windows.

He did this to every.single.box. He didn't take any.

I went over to survey the aftermath, each and every box of cupcakes was ruined, they were half crumpled with the icing smeared all over the sides of the box.

He had crushed the cupcakes and killed my dreams.

I was dessert-less and devastated.

I had no treat.

True story.

*

I found a local sushi bar with decent spider rolls in Montreal, yay!

(Note: to non-sushi eaters, the spider roll does not, in fact, contain spiders, instead it contains delicious soft shell crab..mmm)

*

You know how you go to the movies and sometimes you're like, "okay, I'm gonna get something I can't ignore the sweet smell of popcorn today..."

And then you buy the Combo, because it seems like a good deal and you end up with a vat of cola that you then feel obligated to drink 3/4 of, since it cost you like 6 bucks?

We've all been there and because we've all been there, someone has brilliantly come up with a website to help inform your decision of when to pee during the movie.

It's called RunPee.com

So go, enjoy your vat of Coke, or heaven help you, your vat of Fruitopia!

*

I went to the grocery store tonight and bought some yogurt (it was on sale!) and then discovered that if you bought this particular brand of yogurt, then you got....MORE yogurt! free!

My grocery store is a little weird, but hey, I wasn't raised to turn down free goods, ESPecially free food.

So, I have quite a bit of yogurt.

*

Kashi Tasty Little Crackers - Honey Sesame = delicious.

*

Thanks for digesting the blog.

M.

friday brain vomit

2010-09-03T22:21:00.003-04:00

Even though you may have already seen this, because you watched it on tv, or you saw it on the internet, or I already sent it to you...I had to post it, because I love every single thing about it:

Watch it if you enjoy: Jimmy Fallon's boyish charm OR Tina Fey OR Glee OR Don Draper OR Hurley OR Joel McHale OR Springsteen OR rousing musical numbers OR choreographed running & dancing.

Also, I want my hair to look like Tina Fey's, circa this video.

*

I just got in from a futile attempt at shoe shopping. I need comfortable, reliable, non-ugly, hopefully black, not overpriced shoes for work.

I went to every effing shoe store in downtown Montreal, and did I find these shoes? I did not.

And as it becomes less likely that I will ever find anything (which btw will put me in either crocs or running shoes, in the middle of winter, at work), the more frustrated & in the mood for face punching I get.

I hate shoe shopping. Shoes suck. They are uncomfortable and expensive and stupid.

No one will ever accuse me of fulfilling the girl-who-loves-shoes stereotype, that's for darn sure.

I did get some socks though.

*

Poll Results:

The true ending of the facebook movie 'The Social Network" will be:

That the Mark guy reads ALL your messages & wall exchanges, while he sits alone, in his mansion.

Coming in a close second was:

Two words: CIA front.

Good to know the majority of my readers/voters are paranoid :P

Coming in third was:

A visit to a psych ward in which all the patients are in for 'farmville addiction recovery'.

Yeah, I could see that one genuinely happening.

Tied for last place were:

A board of directors meeting ending in physical violence over a possible 'Dislike' button.

That there really is a way to tell who looks at your profile & how often, and it will be included in the next update, thus prompting mass panic & deletion of profiles immediately following the movie.

That relationship status updates will become legally binding in 2011, thus many users will find themselves married to friends, imaginary people or in a constant state of 'it's complicated'.

All good possibilities, thanks for voting, it'll be fun to see what comes true in the movie!

*

So you know that 'Disney vault' thing, were they only put movies out for a certain time and then, like stop production for 10 years or something and it's impossible to get a copy?

Annoying yes. However, the 'vault'* is opening and they are reissuing Beauty and the Beast on DVD in October (5th to be exact). And I'm gonna buy it.

We only have it on VHS at home and it happens to be my favourite (traditionally animated)** Disney movie.

My top five list, since you asked:

1. Beauty and the Beast
2. The Lion King
3. Aladdin
4. Cinderella
5. The Little Mermaid

**(To clarify, for the purists and interested, I consider any Pixar film or animation/live action film to be in different categories and therefore in an altogether different lists, sorry my blog, my rules, here is the Pixar list):

1. Wall*E
2. Toy Story
3. Up
4. Monsters, Inc.
5. The Incredibles

*I like to think that it is an actual vault, buried somewhere deep underground at DinsneyWorld and they put all the dvds in there that they make HMV, Wal-Mart and Amazon return to them.

Anyway, back to my initial point, I'm super excited to get Beauty and the Beast, Belle is my favourite Disney character, it has the best songs and come on, that library? What's not to love?

*

New poll up.

M.

awe-some

2010-08-31T21:15:00.001-04:00

nothern reflections

2010-08-31T20:36:00.003-04:00

My sister is going on an adventuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeee!

She is moving waaaaay up north in Ontario, to an aboriginal community to teach highschool.

I'm incredibly proud of her and excited for her, this is going to be quite the experience.

Delightfully, she has decided to blog it!

You can follow all her adventures at Me Fail English? That's Unpossible! (check out the map, to see how far she's going)

http://adventures-of-miss-l.blogspot.com/

I certainly will!

M.

WC

2010-08-30T20:34:00.004-04:00

So, this morning, I was getting ready to go back to work after a short holiday away from Montreal.

I pick up my university ring, from the ring stand where it lives.

I dropped it (butterfingers!), watched it ricochet off the sink, fly through the air and land gracefully in the toilet.

Good morning Michelle, time to put on some rubber gloves and fish your belongings out of a toilet bowl.

Have a super day.

she's just like me, but not

2010-08-23T00:01:00.001-04:00

Happy 25th Birthday to my lil' sister!

Love you!

Storytime!

2010-08-19T20:42:00.005-04:00

So last night, before I went to bed, I poured myself a glass of water, as I am occasionally apt to do, as my cold is making me super thirsty.

I put it on my nightstand, as is standard practice (I even have a coaster) and got into bed.

After about 20 min of coughing I was thirsty again and reached for the water. Instead of picking it up, I knocked it down.

My reaction time was fast, faster than usual because it only took me a second to picture in my mind's eye where the torrent of water was headed...raining directly onto my powerbar.

I leap out of bed, pulling all the plugs out of the wall simultaneously and then survey the destruction:

Water IN my clock radio, soaking the carpet, drenching the 3 cords that had been plugged into the wall & water damage on my hardcover book.

Oh, and my cellphone just floated by.

30 minutes later, half a roll of paper towels later, I appear to have the situation under control. My book is drying on the dresser, and my nightstand has never been so dust free.

I have a talent.

It is not a useful talent, but it is a talent, all the same.

There was no electrical fire.

I was not electrocuted.

Let's call it a successful night.

The End.

under review

2010-08-17T22:22:00.003-04:00

I FINALLY saw Inception tonight...I have things to say but no words yet...it was good. Nolan always takes time to sink in. I'll have some thoughts later.

Mini Review: It's good, go see it, it belongs on a big screen.

*

I'm liking 'The Suburbs', the new album from Arcade Fire thus far, it needs a few more listens but there is some good stuff on there..

*

I don't really like this cold I have, it gets a bad review.

*

Harry has also been keeping me company..

There is some good stuff coming out this fall..I'm glad my theater has cheap Tuesdays.

*

Mini rant: What's with people checking their smart phones in the middle of a movie? You can't stay unconnected for 2 whole hours? Really?

Speaking of which, I'm probably gonna see the 'facebook' movie "The Social Network", as fellow blogger Mark has pointed out, the trailer captures the creepy essence of facebook and I am intrigued.

I also love love the radiohead cover too (again, these are ideas that I have both stolen & share with fellow blogger Mark)

*

Living downtown mini review: I really wish it didn't always smell like hot garbage. really.

*

2nd Mini rant: clapping at the end of a movie is weird, I've said this before and I'll keep saying it, until people stop doing it.

*

I watched the Bachelorette, I blogged it for you, my loyal followers, but its follow-up "Bachelor Pad" is the worst thing on tv...like seriously....I shan't be blogging or watching it.

Review: Worst.reality.ever.

*

K, I think that's it for now..

New poll up.

M.

Eat Blog Sleep

2010-08-05T18:31:00.010-04:00

First, in solidarity with fellow blogger Winnie Cooper, I present,
"From pantry of a 29 year old":

Plus, how cute are the little toast crunch guys?

*

Allow me a cranky Shoppers Drugmart moment:

Okay guy, I understand it is difficult to choose the perfect Axe scent with which to attract the ladies, but do you really need to spray it down the aisle, where I'm standing, so I have to fight my way through a toxic cloud of "Smells like a douche-bag!" to flee the store? No, I betcha didn't!

*

I had to post this video, it is really fun & cool, it's called 'words' and is visual word association (there is a mature moment, make sure you are a mature viewer)

(via: Vulture)

The creators have a website called Everynone.com where there are several other videos and series to watch..I'll also recommend 'Moments', which I'll post below as well:

Moments from Everynone on Vimeo.

*

Book Report; yours, not mine..

So, this whole Eat, Pray, Love thing...thoughts? I've had one review (of the book) from a female friend and I'm open to other recommendations/reviews

...have you read the book, what did you think of it?

It's on my maybe list.

Speaking of books, I'm on GoodReads now and I quite like it..are you? Let's find each other and talk about books.

*

Poll stuff:

I have yet to post a 'live blog'...

(and by "live" I mean, I pay attention to what's happening at the time and take some notes, on a piece of paper, so I can blog about it later)

...of a trip to the mall, because I haven't been to the mall recently.

I've been under the weather lately so I'm not much for shopping.

I did go to Zellers, which might prove for an interesting, if not rage-filled blog, but we'll maybe save that for another time.

Also, next time I watch a movie at home alone, I promise to blog it...aren't you excited?

Are you hoping it involves vampires?

Only time will tell.

Latest results:

The favourite local summer-time activity of my blog-readers: patio sitting with 4 votes

Coming in a very close second, is a tie between: swimming (with 3) & Running in terror from the sun for a shady place in which to reapply your 50 spf sunscreen (with 3)

I'm guess these 6 people don't really hang out much.

Honorable mentions:

Waiting impatiently for the fall, while watching the weathernetwork for signs of hope (2)

Some kinda wildernessy outdoor physical activity & Some kinda urban outdoor physical activity & Going out to get ice cream & Festivaling & Reading & Putting together supercute summer outfits (all with 1 each)

Come on guys, no napping? Or maybe that's an all year round activity? I hope so. Napping rocks, trust.

_ _

In the great picking teams poll of 2010, one vampire came out victorious:

Angel with an overwhelming (for my blog) 14 point majority. People are still pretty dedicated to the vampires in the Whedon universe, of this, I highly approve.

Coming in far second with 5 votes, is Eric (from TrueBlood) mmhmm [I'm staying spoiler free for season 3, as we speak]

Third with 4 votes is another Whedon creation, Spike.

Our Edward had 2 votes, coming in fourth, there are clearly not enough 'tweens reading my blog. Untapped audience.

Honorable mentions:

Jacob (the only werewolf on the list), Vampire Bill (also from TrueBlood) & Nick Knight our Canadian content on the blog (Remember Forever Knight! well, one of you does..)..all with one vote each.

Also garnering one vote each:

someone who doesn't understand the context of my poll (I can recommend some great dvds and books to get you caught up),

someone who fears I have no life (not to worry, I do, it just happens to involve the occasional fictional lusty vampire)

and someone who is giving up on helping me (good call).

I can't believe no one voted for Dracula! He's pretty awesome and trust me, the book is better than any film productions you've seen.

This was a very successful poll with an impressive 31 votes, I didn't know 31 people read my blog! Unless my Mom & sister both voted like 15 times each...

No new poll yet, I'm running low on good ideas.

M. ...or according to the "vampire name generator" Chastity (I kid you not)

This is a blog post about the Bachelorette Finale, you have been warned

2010-08-04T22:17:00.006-04:00

*Spoiler Alert: Obvi*

I promised to ‘live blog’ the bachelorette.

I was unable to watch it on Monday night, as I was entertaining, however, I knew through the power of the internets, that I would be able to catch up quickly.

So, I have remained unspoiled and will now blog the finale, as it has been posted on the Citytv website.

I give you: The Bachelorette

First up, we have ‘this season, on the bachelorette’ all the hits: Krazy Kasey! Douchey Justin! Idiot Frank!

In Tahiti: great things happened! Water was very blue! Ali and Frank “needed to talk” and then he dumped her for his old girlfriend!

TONIGHT: Bora Bora! Paradise! Men of her dreams! Meet her parents…..er…this looks a little awkward. Dad isn’t sold on the premise?

Ali changes into a ballgown and makes THE BIGGEST DECISION OF HER LIFE.

We won’t believe what happens!

Are you pumped? That was quite the preview.

Bora Bora looks gorgeous, I’m pretty impressed. That is some turquoise water.

Ahh more memories of this season: silly sweaters, travel, the lion king, bitching out douchey men.

Yet another shot of Ali in a bikini, I could Never be on this show, unless we could do it..in Montreal, in the dead of winter.

Ali feels protected & safe with Roberto, he makes her feel like a woman.

She’s always had really strong feelings for Roberto (she’s always really wanted in his pants).

Ali is friends with Chris, and is falling for him, he makes her laugh and has ‘great character'.

He is a teddy bear and they are FROM THE SAME STATE, which seems like a really big deal.

(she is way more sweet with Chris and she totes fell in love with his sweet, perfect Cape Cod house).

Another bikini shot, entirely different bikini, I’m gonna keep a count this evening.

Current bikini count: 2

Preview: EVERYTHING HAPPENS! SHOCKING DECISION!

(online)Commercial for ‘Prom Queen’ on citytv.com, I bet Ali was a prom queen, she often wears prom dresses on this show.

“Roberto makes a great first impression” = he’s Super hot

Roberto really wants things to go well today. It looks like he has a gift, buying your way in is a good call.

HE IS HERE FOR THE RIGHT REASONS. That is the most important thing on this show, ever. I’ve learned that from watching all season.

Ali’s parents, brother and sister. Ali is clearly the most attractive part of this family.

Dad doesn’t look convinced that this isn’t all a crock.

Time for the ‘talk' with Ali’s siblings. I get this totally, have to look out for the sister.

Ali explains to her parents: Roberto calms her down. Mom likes how romantic he is and how handsome he is.

The Mom talk: Any questions about Ali? ‘What can I do to keep her happy?’ You’re already doing it! (I think the Mom wants to do him too).

Hey, here’s a question, what do we know about Ali? Answer: almost nothing. Let’s hope it’s a little different for the boys.

Awww Mom cried and said something in Spanish to Roberto.

Icky non-feminist moment (or the foundation on which this show is built): Talking to the Dad is the important thing, and getting his blessing. Mom, not so much.

The Dad talk: Roberto is ‘traditional’ and wants to ask for Ali’s hand, as she does not own it and has no autonomy at all. Roberto just said ‘happy’ a lot.

Dad talk con’t: ‘do you love Ali?’ He does. Dad thinks he’s a great guy with a good background, after talking to him for 10 min and so will sign over the ownership papers, Ali is his!

Roberto is now teaching Mom to salsa dance, she definitely wants to do him.

Ali has a strong connection with Roberto, I don’t want to type his name anymore, henceforth he shall be known as Robo!

Make-out time (they’ve left the family and are alone).

Ali can’t find anything wrong with Robo..at all. That’s probably a bad sign.

Coming UP: Chris meets the family. Ali makes out with everyone. Ali wears a prom dress!

Ali & Chris meet up, he appears to have a basket of fruit, this is an excellent gift.

Chris looks delicious.

Chris hugs the ladies, shakes the guy’s hands, talks about the importance of family.

CHRIS IS FROM THE SAME STATE AS ALI. All are excited.

Everyone is a teacher! The Mom’s are both nurses!

Chris’s shirt is unbuttoned a little too much for the family visit, they want to know things about him, but not necessarily all his manscaping habits.

This just IN: Chris’s Dad is from Montreal, and Ali’s Dad is from Montreal and I live in Montreal! Holy Crap!

Sad talk about Chris’s mother, who recently passed away.

Sister/Brother talk: Chris wanted it to be natural, like become friends first and take his time. And so I ask, WHY IS THIS NORMAL ADORABLE GUY ON THIS SHOW?

Mom/Ali talk: friendship first = good. He’s family oriented = good. She doesn’t know who to recommend.

And now the Dad Permission talk…if he doesn’t approve..Ali might not approve, well, I guess that’s logical?

The host wants me to apply to be the next bachelorette, I’m flattered.

Chris just said “wicked amazing”, I love this guy.

Okay the ‘hand in marriage’ talk, Chris knows what is important, and it’s Ali.

He falls in love with her everytime he sees her. Dad’s blessing: that’s a yes…so, I guess he’ll have to stop the sale to Robo now..or…wwwait…how will this work….

Bikini count: 3

Chris appears to have a tattoo, I like this information and would care to know more.

Chris got along with the family so WELL. Make-out time.

Chris is also too much to type, hereafter he shall be known as ‘Ris
Ali is ‘Ris’s soulmate. I hope she doesn’t dump his ass…but if she does he would definitely be a great next bachelor.

Ali’s head is full of decisions!

COMING UP: Last ditch effort to win Ali’s heart! Ali wears a prom dress!

Ali has two amazing guys….her family has to help her decide! She has so many thoughts!

Dad likes Robo. Sister/Brother like ‘Ris. Mom……? Dad is defending Robo. Sister says: Too many fireworks upfront might not last (i.e. don’t choose Robo just because you want to do him, all the time.)

Mom defends ‘Ris…he is AUTHENITC.

Sooooo, scoreboard:

Robo: 1 ‘Ris: 3

Ali is SO glad Robo met her family but she really just want some ‘alone time’ with him. I think she means ‘sexy times.’

Montage of fun: Jet skiing, (bikini count: 4), sting rays, Ali freaks out at the sting rays touching her, Robo protects her, Ali concludes that he is good to be true for the 88th time.

Next up, Private Island, I think there might be sexytimes ahead.

Blah blah special people, blah blah places together = Vacations are more fun when you have a lovebunny with you & when they’re free

Tropical storm, time.for.the.sexy
This is the most magical moment Ali has ever experienced in life.

Back at Robo’s cabin, candles, bubbly, their ‘last night before the final rose..’

This series of cabanas on the water is apparently a Hilton.

It is difficult for Robo to open up, so Ali wants them to talk instead of just kissing.

Robo thought the date was awesome. Ali asks Robo what his type was before they met…clever.

Oh God she just told him he’s perfect. Dude, not good.

Serious conversation time.. First though, gifts! And they’re ON THE BED.

It’s a photo of Ali and Robo, she loves it..Robo wrote her a letter on the back; it is very schmaltzy and involves Spanish. Make out time.

Serious Talk Time: Robo knows how he feels about the next step, he seems nervous, relates the story about talking to her Dad, Robo tells Ali that he has “definitely definitely fallen in love with her”

Ali’s heart exploded.

More make outs. Is that all the serious? Really?

How about:

Do you want kids? Where would we live? Should I work, are you going to work? What kind of house do you want to live in?

ALI LOVES ROBO AND DOESN’T WANT TO SAY GOODBYE TO HIM FOR HER DATE WITH ‘RIS!!!!!!

That is not a good sign for him.

‘Ris is Very excited about his date. ‘Ris is talking about this like it’s a done deal. This is not good. He is totally gonna get Dumped.

Well, Ali showed up but looks flustered. ‘Ris sees that this isn’t good.

Ali is trying to explain: my family loved you! Um…….*awkward* I don’t know what to do! You’re wonderful! Sometimes even when people get along, they aren’t meant to be! (she is totally gonna dump him)…. Ugh…he looks so sad..

Ali: I’m in love with somebody else.

I’m pretty sure this isn’t the way the show is supposed to go. She’s kicking him off before the final rose!

‘Ris is SO SAD.

Ali wanted to spare him the final rose bullshit, that’s kinda good of her.

‘Ris is talking about what he learned and taking it well, he’s So Normal. I’m in love with ‘Ris.

Ali is crying, ‘Ris is thanking her for being honest..omigoodness ‘Ris wished her luck!

This almost seems real. I’ll be damned.

And that’s that. Now Ali just had to tell Robo and he has to accept the rose.

Bora Bora is effing beautiful, fyi.

Back to ‘Ris: he’s calm & sad. He understands that he wasn’t the one and he is really hurt. He is still saying nice things about Ali. He wants to see her happy. Oh rainbow…but is it a DOUBLE RAINBOW? No, it’s a sign from his Mom…

The producers are practically screaming at us: ‘Ris is the next Bachelor ya’ll!!!!!

He is still looking for love…now he’s riding off into the sunset and he’ll keep looking! Maybe he can find me!

Ali: Any woman would be lucky to have Chris (ie: sign up at abc.com ya’ll!)

Robo montage…Ali wants to scream her love for him from the roof!

Robo is looking at rings, according to the ringman, it shows your love for the other person…man those are Huge rocks!

Robo is worried she’ll say no.

Robo is shirtless…let’s take a moment..

He’s suiting up!

Robo only wants to propose once in his life and won’t do it, if it doesn’t feel right.

Ali has an assistant to help get her into the prom dress.

Ali loves Robo more than she ever thought she would.

Will they want each other back???? Will they have dressed up for Nothing??

WHAT WILL HAPPEN? I mean, it seems pretty clear at this point…

Everything has lead up to this.

There is our host, escorting Robo to his final moment with Ali!

Robo has been Thinking so Much…he didn’t know what to expect coming on the show…recap recap recap…he’s Nervous.

Robo wants to be her man! He’s saying things about the rest of his life…

Ali lets him know she sent ‘Ris packing, she loves him!

He wants to grow old, have babies…down on one knee time…GIANT DIAMOND time

She said yes! She is laughing like she is drunk! Maybe she is! It’s a fairytale! Life is perfect!

They’re playing a song from the Lion King! Romantic recap! Montage! Elton John!

I give it a year.

Can you feel the love tonight? It is where we are.....

More montage.

Kissing in the rain! Holding hands! Spinning!

And he carries her off into the sunset…for some sexytimes.

It turned out pretty much how I thought it would.

Now there is an ‘After the final rose’ show, which I guess I’ll watch but maybe not live blog it, thank you for taking this journey with me.

'Ris & 'chelle fo' eva

for you, my voting public

2010-07-29T12:16:00.006-04:00

So we have a winner in our 'what should michelle live blog next' poll...

A Trip to the Mall with 8 votes.

I'd like to think that half of my poll voters who elected for this option, did so because they could picture how odd I will look, writing things down in a notebook, in a random mall foodcourt.

I had also decided that that I would live blog whatever came in second and third (since I appear to be out of my own blog ideas).

Which means, you may also choose to read a future post about:

The Bachelorette Finale (4 votes)

Viewing of a Favourite Film & Something Ghastly on MTV are tied for third place with 2 votes each...

so, the tie breaker will be...whatever I do first: break out an old favourite dvd or watch something on MTV (that isn't Cribs).

Finally, one person wanted to hear about a trip to the grocery store, I'll keep that mind for the future, should I ever really be searching for a topic.

My Mom also wrote in her vote, she'd like me to write about when I was a kid, I shall try to come up with an awesome/funny story to post for ya Mom (she gets special treatment because she birthed me).

I think this whole poll deal went well & was very democratic.

Thanks for your participation!

New poll up. And you can still vote in the vampire poll, should you be so inclined.

*

Okay, maybe I haven't watched enough of it to 'get it', but can someone explain to me why people always buy so many damn vowels on Wheel of Fortune?

I mean, they do it until there are no vowels left to buy, but my understanding of this game and do correct me if I'm wrong here...

...each vowel COSTS money and each consonant EARNS you money.

Like, why would you spend money that you could win?

Also, if they guess a vowel and are wrong they are still deducted an amount of money, so, BUYING VOWELS MEANS YOU WIN LESS MONEY! WHY DO YOU BUY SO MANY VOWELS?

It can't just be me who fails to see the logic here, right?

Related sidenote: How much of a dick-move is it when Pat opens the prize envelope to show the contestant what they just lost at the end of the game, because they just weren't quick or smart enough to solve the puzzle?

M.

On deep fried chicken & housekeeping

2010-07-23T18:26:00.009-04:00

Hey ya'll,

I know a lot of you read my posts in a reader-type environment, or on the google buzz, etc. But, I also know some of you read the posts, straight up, on my blog or you visit to vote in the ol' polls.

Given these facts, I've added to my sidebar..to the right ------>

There is now a search for my blog content and I've also added a tag cloud.

It's really all about making your life easier, so, you're welcome.

*

Now onto my blogging ridiculousness.

Is anyone else a little bit fascinated by what is going on with KFC lately?

First, they brought us the 'Double Down', a sandwich made with no bread, instead 2 breaded pieces of chicken with cheese and bacon inside.

And recently, I've been seeing commercials for the 'Boxmaster', which is a breaded piece of chicken paired with cheese AND a hash brown. This is pretty amazing/disgusting.

I mean, it shouldn't be such a surprise, since these are the folks who originated the idea of Buckets of food.

I'm always amazed that they stay in business, since 'havoc' isn't even the right word for how my body reacts to ingesting any KFC foods (which hasn't happened in many years).

But I think maybe, they're kinda genius, I mean at this point, their food is like a Challenge. Like, come, TRY to eat this, feel victorious!

Like I said, fascinating.

*

Hey, does anyone else like, really love laundry?

Not the doing it part, but the end result?

I was having this discussion with someone the other day. We both love ourselves some laundry, getting it done feels like an accomplishment, and I personally enjoy the folding/warm towels/fabric softener smell. It's all so orderly.

If I had to choose one household chore, laundry would be it. And cleaning the toilet/dealing with the garbage would not be it.

The only thing that would make my laundry doing and therefore, my life better, would be a rolling laundry hamper, with a handle. Oh yes.

I am nothing, if not practical (and kinda lame).

*

A story to completely counter any crazy ideas about my housekeeping prowess prompted by the last section of this post.

One of my couch throw pillows has a tear in it and the stuffing is coming out. Normally a person might just sew up the tear, which I would do, except I don't have a needle or thread.

I mean, I guess, there might be a needle but no thread or vice versa kicking around here, but not to my knowledge.

How do I not even have a basic sewing kit? I literally haven't sewn anything since middle school.

Yet another reason, along with my lack of painting/drawing/singing/piano forte playing skills that would have made me a terrible Austen heroine, or even a secondary Austen character like Charlotte Lucas or Harriet Smith.

Good thing it's 2010..and I'm not fictional.

I guess maybe I'll wait until my Mom comes to visit me again?

*

Poll sidenote: who knew live blogging the Bachelorette would be in the lead? I had no idea anyone else was watching the absurdity (besides myself & ShimmerShine) and I didn't vote.

Curious indeed.

M.

I am not a grown up

2010-07-21T23:45:00.005-04:00

2 new polls, vote my lovelies.

*

Things I am mildly excited about:

CHOCOLATE MINI WHEATS (I haven't had the opportunity to try them yet, as they were $6.50 at the local supermarche, but someday soon..maybe I'll live blog my first bowl).

Inception, I still haven't seen it and the reviews are mixed, but it's definitely on my Must List, I mean, I paid money to watch Eclipse..so yeah..I'm still gonna see Inception, despite reviews :P

I am currently rereading Eclipse...because, I can't help myself.

Harry Potter & the Deathly Hollows Part I will be released in 5 months and I am already REALLY EXCITED. [However, I will NOT be 'completing the journey in 3D' thankyouverymuch]

I went paddleboating in Montreal and it was awesome.

*

Lately, I can't get enough...

...rice crackers, seriously, for like a couple months now. I suppose it could be worse, like if I couldn't get enough KFC Double Down Sandwiches or something.

...of the blog: Letters to Twilight

These girls (women) are hysterically funny. I have somehow de-evolved into twi-hard fanland once again with the release of the Eclipse movie. Go figure.

Again, it could be worse, like I could be obsessively reading Stephanie Meyers' books WHILE eating Double Down Sandwiches AND Chocolate Mini Wheats, that I have spent my life savings on. It's all about perspective.

...sleep. But that's no surprise.

I can't find enough...

...bloggable topics...I could just share the random crap I come across..like an amazing new consumer product...the TV hat:

TV HAT!

The thing that I love most about this, other than how it looks & other than the woman from the ad, in the 'airport' having like a full body fit watching something HILARIOUS...

...is that you need a different, incredibly expensive, consumer product to have any utility for this special item.

A snuggie it ain't.

*

Okay, well if you want to help me improve the quality and quantity of my posts, then vote in the live blog poll (or comment on this post) & let me know what I ought to be writing about, besides breakfast cereal advancements and lusty teen vampire fiction.

Or, you can vote in the picking teams poll, if you're in the same boat that I am ;)

Adieu,
M.

Things that are Difficult (or not)

2010-07-19T22:57:00.010-04:00

Difficulty 1: Appreciating Taylor Lautner's abs in a non-creepy way.

A little background for the uninitiated, Taylor is the actor who portrays the (often shirtless) character Jacob, in the wildly popular Twilight saga movies.

Taylor is 18 and looks like this:

Oh hai taylor...i love hiking too!

I am, currently, ...an age that is not 18.

Difficult.

Difficulty 2: Not obsessively listening to my shiny new music & giving fair play to the other inhabitants of my ipod.

I'm looking at you Elbow & your Seldom Seen Kid and at you Stars & The Five Ghosts.

Difficult.

*

The Opposite of Difficult

I have found a way to sit/lie on my weird ikea non-couch that is surprisingly comfortable.

Gold star for slothful persistence!

*

Snack Break:

local strawberries! yum.

*

First timer post: UFC!

I recently watched a UFC show from start to finish...well, like the start to finish that was televised on the pay-per-view (I did not pay); I was not in vegas. So, this was UFC 116.

I did not live blog it, but I have 2 thoughts to share.

(here is the wikipedia entry, in case you don't know what ufc is, so, in case you're my mom, hi mom!)

My 2 thoughts on UFC: (incidentally, neither of these thoughts will be about homo-eroticism, but don't think I didn't notice it..)

1. I was horrified to see that Joe Rogan is the official announcer or host or something, I cannot stand Joe Rogan, ever since he did that Fear Factor show.

(remember fear factor?) ugh.

2. My favourite moment, of the entire event, was the Japanese fighter, because of his entrance song.

(they all have their own entrance songs and generally favour things like Metallica, Red Hot Chili Peppers & Eminem).

Mr. Akiyama, entered the MGM Grand, full of approx. 10 000 18-35 year old men (and a couple celebrities), all hoping to see some serious blood spatter & major mixed marital art violence, to this song:

Therefore, Mr. Akiyama is my favourite ufc fighter.

M.

2 items

2010-07-08T19:07:00.005-04:00

I went to a lake Canada Day weekend, it was fun, I hung out with good friends, I walked & talked, I beached, I made s'mores at the campfire, I even took two canoe trips!

However, I also acquired 33 mosquito bites, this was less fun. My legs are a disaster area. I think I must be pretty delicious.

*

Speaking of things that may or may not be delicious, I bought some walnut bread from a bakery, got it home and realized it was purple.

Photographic evidence of violet loaf.

M.

weathered

2010-06-29T14:27:00.003-04:00

Okay, apparently there was a huge storm last night that many of my coworkers were chit chatting about today, power went out in a few places and there were funnel clouds in the Montreal area...

...and I didn't notice, again.

curiouser and curiouser.

There was a 5.0 magnitude earthquake in Montreal and...

2010-06-23T19:11:00.000-04:00

...I didn't feel it.

M.

I want the world. I want the whole world. I want to lock it all up in my pocket. It's my bar of chocolate. Give it to me now.

2010-06-22T20:16:00.004-04:00

Every time this AT&T ad airs on my tv, I really just want to watch Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (which is sad, because I don't own it).

I even had to do some googling to find out what the ad was actually for, as I am so distracted by my need to watch Gene Wilder teach naughty, greedy children a lesson, that I have never paid attention to the branding at the end.

I am not down with this particular cultural appropriation.

Disappointing telecom ad that merely teases the gentle viewer:

"want to change the world? there's nothing...to..it."

The real thing, chocolate-covered to boot:

*

That is all.

M.

Waxing on the brazilian(s)

2010-06-21T12:51:00.007-04:00

So, I watched Another worldcup game, this time in a bar, with other people!

(It seems as though I am successfully masquerading as a real Montrealer, not to worry though, my incessant questions & comments throughout the game, definitely gave me up as a novice)

Again, for a more accurate experience, you may want to visit vuvuzela Yarns from M.

The highlights (like CBC Sports!):

Brazil vs. Cote D'Ivoire

Brazil was wearing yellow (sponsored by Nike) and Cote D’Ivoire was wearing green (sponsored by Puma) ***[this distinction took me a good 10 min]

I was thinking, the refs would really need to be multilingual in FIFA and was told [after I pondered this aloud] that they were all taught English swears, so they could card for language

This apparently angered England and the US, since swears in all the other languages were not included in the tutorial

White shorts + international soccer tournament = grass stains!

Apparently, many of the soccer fans who traveled to South Africa were ill informed about the weather and didn't pack for cool/low temps so, FIFA & other retailers have done good toque and scarf business.

Brazil scored many goals, mostly on account of Kaka, apparently their star player (who is very pretty and I would imagine gets lots of action ‘off the field’).

Edit: he’s actually married, still pretty though.

I got to wondering about refs..is there a ref school? How do you become a ref at an international level? Do refs intern?

I had never considered referee as a career choice, but I do really like rules and I am also fond of telling people what to do..

I do not, however, like being yelled at.

I went to the ladies room at one point and missed Cote D’Ivoire’s one goal of the afternoon.

This was apparently the first goal that an African nation has ever scored against Brazil, in a worldcup game.

Everyone was wearing such brightly coloured shoes!

I would have more colour commentary & fun facts for you, but we were watching it en francais, so I don’t know what the commentators were discussing.

There is so much running, seriously!

Also, those ‘keepers’, have to like, leap through the air, a lot. That net is big, yo.

Near the end, things seemed to break down a bit, it almost looked like a fight might break out (in the game, not at the bar) and I learned that players apparently fake injuries to run down the clock (this seems very ungentlemanly to me).

Kaka got a 2 yellow cards, which meant he got a red card in the end, which again, bans him from playing in the next game…the people in the bar (every single one of them Brazil fans, except the folks with me) were Very upset about this.

Brazil won 3 to 1 (I just had to look up the score, as I did not remember)

Thus, leading me to conclude: Brazil is very good at soccer.

M.

skirting the issue

2010-06-19T21:27:00.014-04:00

You know my concern for all the women out there who are under the the unfortunate assumption that leggings are actually pants..well..it's just gotten worse.

It the last couple days, I have seen no less than 3 women who have completely forgotten to put anything on their bottom halves at all! They forgot their pants, skirts, leggings, everything!

How embarrassing for them!

I saw a girl on the metro, wearing nothing but a long sweater, poor thing couldn't even sit down!

I wonder what has caused this sudden forgetfulness in our young women?

I thought as a public service, I would publish this handy guide:

You're welcome!

M.

biker chic

2010-06-18T17:46:00.003-04:00

So remember when I lived in Ottawa & many many people felt the need to have this dialogue with me:

Why don't you skate on the canal?
You know you could skate all the way to work!
Do you have skates?
YOU SHOULD BE SKATING.

Well folks, now I live in the land of:

Want to go bike riding?
Do you have a bike?
Have you been on the trails?
You know you could get a Bixi pass, right?
You should bike to work!
WHY AREN'T YOU CYCLING?

This is truly the land of the cyclists. Which is good, people are getting exercise, cutting down on traffic, cutting down on pollution, cutting down on oil consumption.

I however, am not one of these people.

I haven't ridden a bike since I was about 12.

I'm not balanced enough, confident enough and far too breakable for a bike.

I think this is okay. I walk most places and when I can't walk, I take public transit.

It's not like I'm driving around in a Hummer, running over baby seals or something.

Me and the bike just aren't gonna happen, sorry Montreal.

M.

Michelle & the "Beautiful Game"

2010-06-13T14:33:00.007-04:00

Everyone seems pretty excited about this whole world cup thing, so in the spirit of trying to understand (and because I'm sitting here anyway), I have tuned in.

The teams are Germany and Australia.

The field is really really big.

Everyone in the entire stadium appears to have those awful air horn things, this is distracting. (Edit! for a more interactive & accurate blog post, go here and turn on your speakers)

It took me a couple minutes to realize that the um..walls? boards? around the field were not static, but change advertisements every minute or so.

The commentators are British, is this always the case? Is this footage from the BBC?

Someone scored. People are excited. It was Germany apparently.

The players are "earning corners", this appears to mean they can kick from a certain corner..I think.

How long is a game? Are there quarters or periods?

Someone got a yellow card. I don't know what that means..wikipedia says:

a caution for...

1. Unsporting behaviour
2. Dissent by word or action
3. Persistently infringing the laws of the game
4. Delaying the restart of play
5. Failing to respect the required distance of a corner kick or free kick
6. Entering or re-entering the field of play without the referee’s permission
7. Deliberately leaving the field of play without the referee’s permission

According to the commentator, many of these players on the German team are under 25.

This is like hockey, but less happens.

The major sponsors appear to be:

Coke, VISA, SONY, McDonalds, Emirates Air, KIA, Castrol, Continental, adidas, Football for Hope, Powerade

Everyone is really sweaty.

Just as I was surprised by how much time the puck spent in the air (at the one and only hockey game I ever attended), I am surprised by how much time the ball spends in the air, due in large part, to a lot of head butting.

Maybe those aren't air horns, perhaps there are bees?

Someone almost scored, but did not. Another yellow card.

One guy just dive bombed over another guy's head and they aren't wearing a lot of padding, they should be more careful!

Another goal, it was the guys in white..which is...Germany.

There are some crazy thigh muscles happening here.

Okay, maybe it isn't bees, are they near a race track?

There is a player named Friedrich! The names Friedrich, Liesl, Brigitta and Rolfe always remind me of the Sound of Music.

*distractedly singing to myself from the soundtrack*

Someone is hurt! Oh, he's okay.

Schweinsteiger (I think he's German) seems to be one of the more important players, he is very active in this game.

Let's talk about outfits for a moment, the German team is wearing white, this seems like a bad choice. They are getting pretty dirty.

Maybe not a race track, maybe a really noisy air conditioning system?

The commentator just spoke of a 2nd half, so I'm guessing we're still in the 1st.

Heh, the refs have little headsets, Madonna-style.

Halftime! Will there be a musical number? Yes, the CBC man just informed me, there will BE a halftime show.

Oh worldcup specific commercials, now I know who the ppl at CIBC are cheering for, and the history of the goal dance, thank you Coca Cola.. ugh Rogers.

Hey, none of those CIBC ppl said they were cheering for Canada, does Canada have a team?

Just a moment...Apparently not, or we do have a team, but they are not there.

Okay, Captain Morgan Halftime. Oh, first some more commentary.

Budweiser is the official beer sponsor of the worldcup.

Wait...the game just started again. Where is the halftime show? WHERE IS THE COMPELLING MUSICAL NUMBER!?

Someone just got hit by the ball and everyone is mad.

Well, I have noticed something interesting.

Someone almost scored, but didn't.

There is so much running! I could never play soccer.

RED CARD! This seems like a big deal! One guy slammed into another guy, this is apparently not allowed. Oh..it means he can't play in an upcoming game, that's harsh, yo.

Yellow card, Australia sure is getting lots of cards today.

Whoa, the airhorns/bees/air conditioning/air force flybys just got more intense.

I'm going to get a snack.

Germany scored again, this seems to mean that they've won. But the game still goin'

They scored again, they are very good it seems.

They need to be concerned about Ghana, according to the nice British man on the tv.

The British do love their soccer, do you think the Queen is watching the England worldcup matches? Sitting on a couch in Buckingham Palace's Man Cave, with the corgis and Phil, drinking tea, screaming things at the flat screen.

More from the nice British man, over 62 000 people in this stadium, all with their pet bees.

One guy from Germany appears to have hurt his face.

There is a lot of passing and fancy footwork happening.

Things are happening with flags. Sidenote: I do really like that Waving Flag song.

Apparently, to qualify for a world team, you need to be a naturalized citizen of the country, or have parentage from that country.

Not too much is happening, Australia are trying to score a 'consolation goal'.

Something illegal happened! I have no more details.

We are now in overtime.

And we're done. Germans are good at soccer.

Post game show with the CBC folks:

1. Apparently this game was 'marvelous'.

2. The goalie appears to be called 'the keeper', that even sounds British.

3. They disagree with that red card thing, they also think it was (to paraphrase, Clueless style) way harsh.

4. The British CBC guy feels for Australia.

5. The Germans played 'perfect football'.

6. Soccer time appears to be measured by the minute.

7. Germany was 'absolutely dominating'.

**

I just watched a soccer game. The closest I've ever gotten before today was watching Bend it Like Beckham.

Final Verdict: I'm probably done with that now. I've never been very sporty, unless it involves figure skating or dancing or Quidditch.

I hope your team wins! (that will probably only work out for like a couple of you, still, good luck!)

And as a final point of celebration, keeping with the match today..

Other German things I enjoy:

German potatoes
Heidi Klum
Mozart
German Chocolate Cake
Kinder Eggs

M.

This blog post has been sent with high importance

2010-06-11T01:53:00.003-04:00

Memo

To: Michelle
From: Michelle
CC: Future Michelle
Date: June 11, 2010
Re: Cookies, The

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ms. Lake,

It has recently come to our attention, that you have purchased 'the Cookies', directly violating one of the Michelle Inc. Grocery Buying Guidelines.

These Guidelines, you will recall, were put in place to protect Michelle & all related assets.

These assets include, but are not limited to: body weight, shape and self esteem.

'the Cookies' [Oatmeal with dark chocolate chips], along with 'that ice cream' [peanut butter Rolo] and 'the ring-a-lo snacks' put these assets in harms' way and have been placed in the "You really shouldn't" section of the Guidelines.

May we once again remind you, that these specific Guidelines were put in place for your protection, as 'the Cookies' are often consumed 2 or 3 in one sitting, usually very late into the evening.

We recognize, that resources from Michelle Inc. have been used towards the purchase of the current batch of 'the Cookies' and therefore, consuming 'the Cookies' is necessary to avoid loss and waste.

We are confident that once this batch of 'the Cookies' has been consumed, in its entirety, all future trips to the grocery store, will result in a pantry closely following the recommendations of the Guidelines and specifically, that 'the Cookies' will not appear in the pantry of Michelle in the future.**

We appreciate your attention to this matter.

Sincerely,
Michelle

**With the exception of a pantry stocked for invited guests, who will consume at least 50% of 'the Cookies' before they depart Michelle Inc.'s headquarters in Montreal, Quebec.

oh, also poll results.

2010-06-09T22:38:00.008-04:00

I forgot the poll in my last post.

The winner of Canada's Most Attractive Celebrity: Gilbert Blythe

Based on what I know about my readership, this is unsurprising.

For those of you not in the know, do not fear, I've done the work for you, no need to google..

Gilbert courts Anne Shirley in the Anne of Green Gables series of books (despite or perhaps because she broke a slate over his head).

He is dreamy, so this is a good choice.

In second, was the log driver/waltzer.

The log driver's waltz pleases girls completely, so again, this makes sense.

Tied for third:

Thank you for voting.

*

No new poll, I can't think of anything to ask.

*

M.

here's an assemblage o' thoughts, most not of great import

2010-06-09T16:45:00.006-04:00

Hey ya'll,

Just a little note, take some time today, and tell someone how much you care about them.

It might just be the moment they need to hear it most.

They will appreciate it.

M to the L.

*****

Dear Movie Hollywood [& my dear readers, of course],

We haven't spoken in awhile (TV Hollywood and I spoke recently, about the Bachelorette). There are a couple things that we need to review.

First, 3D movies make my head hurt. This happens because of the glasses.

If you are going to produce films primarily in this medium, then please for the love of giant buckets of buttery popcorn, find a way to make 3D glasses fit comfortably over regular specs ('cause some of us are just never gonna get contacts).

Until then, I'm gonna be super irritated everytime I try to watch one of these movies.

Second, I read recently on a blog, that although a couple producers and writers have signed on for a 4th Bourne film, Matt Damon has not (and won't unless he is joined by director Paul Greengrass).

Let me voice my opinion here: BOURNE MOVIES CANNOT BE MADE WITHOUT MATT DAMON. It would be idiocy to do so. I trust that you'll listen to my advice carefully.

Third (actually for TV & Movie Hollywood), in the Glee finale yesterday (Spoiler!), our favourite show choir performed a touching rendition of To Sir With Love.

A classic song, from a classic film starring Sidney Poitier. If you have not seen this movie, go, do, right now. It is fantastic.

I was so excited that the song was on a show like Glee, perhaps a few new viewers will find the film. Good job.

A couple things that may help attract an audience: it is not a musical, it's British! it's about rag-tag kids & their teacher! it's also about class! & race! there's a double decker bus! it's based on a book!

Watch it, trust us (me & Glee)

Fourth (this is more of a comment, just things you really ought to know about me, hollywood),

I also just read about various entertainment writers and their pop culture blind spots (ie the pop culture phenomena that they never got into/missed).

Of this list that they presented, I have experienced them all, except Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, which meh.

I guess mine would be: Lost, 24, Catcher in the Rye, 2001: A space odyssey, Doctor Zhivago, Slaughterhouse-Five and I suppose..Lord of the Rings

(but in this case, I saw the 1st movie & tried to read the book and just got super bored, so I am aware of it)

Also like, various sports.

I should get on some of that, except not Frodo. Just not gonna happen.

Thank you for taking the time to read this correspondence. Please let me know if you have any further questions or concerns.

Effervescently yours,
Michelle

*

Sometimes I look back on my posts and think, I could totally just rename this blog 'Brackets'.

*

One more pop culture aside, how fun is this: Grease Sing-a-Long

I mean basically, my sister and I did this on a weekly basis growing up.

*

M.

Hey world! Will you accept this rose?

2010-05-30T23:32:00.005-04:00

Recently, a fellow blogger wrote about a tv phenomena know as The Bachelorette.

If you've never heard of it, it's a reality show wherein there is a bachelor/bachelorette who 'wants to find love', above all other things, in life, on earth, for eternity.

So, the show puts them up in a mansion, and then carts in 25 or so 'eager for love'/'there for the right reasons' contestants of the opposite sex.

They work to impress the bachelor/bachelorette and after many weeks of fake dates, eliminations and possible hot tub shenanigans, someone is chosen and then the couple rides off into the sunset, & gets married & is happy forever and ever.*

(*note: this last bit does not always work out in the way the producers intend)

I came up with a brilliant idea while discussing this show with ShimmerShine...

A single gal, like myself (or a single unicorn, like himself), could totally apply, get picked (obviously), get a sweet new wardrobe, hang out for the night of 25 ken-doll like mandroids telling you how incredibly sweet, genuine and totally hot you are, in a dozen different ways...

...and then make off with the dresses, shoes & enough ego stroking of your self esteem to last you at least the next 6 months!

And so, I give you my answers to the Actual Bachelorette application form. I'm a shoe-in!

THE BACHELOR / BACHELORETTE
GIRL QUESTIONNAIRE

Today’s Date: The day I start my journey towards love.

Name: Michelle

Address: Canada

Do you have a valid passport? No, but what are political borders when it comes to true love?

How did you hear about our search:

Radio
Television
Magazine
Other, explain: A unicorn told me.

Are you currently:
_X__Working Full Time ___Unemployed
___Working Part Time ___Student

Occupation: Librarian (who has never been 'checked out')

Height: 5'6 Weight: It's impolite to ask.

Age: 29 (overdue for love!)
Hair Color: Brunette
Eye Color: Hazel

THE BACHELOR / BACHELORETTE
GIRL QUESTIONNAIRE

What is your highest level of education?
Degree(s): A Masters degree, but I am an amateur in affairs of the heart.

School(s) Attended: Some nice ones in Canada, but I was so studious that I forgot to look for love, now I am correcting that silly mistake.

Are you a legal resident of the United States? No, but what are legalities when two hearts beat as one?

Where did you grow up? The Hammer

Have you ever been arrested, charged or convicted of a crime of any type? No, I have not, unless it's a crime to wish for exuberant romance in my life.

If so, please give details and dates:

Have you ever had a temporary restraining order issued against you? No, I have not. People want to be near me, not far away!

If so, please give details and dates:

Have you ever filed for bankruptcy or chapter 11? No, one cannot live on love alone..but we can try!

If yes, please explain.

Have you ever been a performer, participant or contestant on television, radio or in film?
If yes, please explain.

I am not concerned about stardom...I just want stars in my eyes and a song in my heart, when I find the One.

THE BACHELOR / BACHELORETTE
GIRL QUESTIONNAIRE

Do you drink alcoholic beverages? No, but I am able to sip a mocktail and giggle like a 16 year old girl, if that is what you require.

Have you ever been married? No, cupid has missed me with his arrow..

If yes, how many times?

If you have been married, why are you no longer together?

How long have such marriage(s) been legally dissolved?

Do you have any children? I could not take care of children, I spend too much time writing longingly in my Love Diary.

If yes, please list their ages and whether they live with you or not.

Are you genuinely looking to get married?

Absolutely, why else would I come on your wonderful programme? For the clothes? To feel good about myself? That would be terrible, but clever!

Why would you want to find your spouse on our TV show?

I can think of no better way, my friends and family can watch and then email me their impressions of the gentlemen, [also I get to live in that wicked mansion]....and...the world can Share in my Love!!

Please describe your ideal mate in terms of physical attraction and in terms of personality attraction.

TV news anchor good looks and hair! Charming with a penchant for guitar playing, poetry writing, scrapbook making and extreme sports.

How many serious relationships have you been in?

Serious television relationships? Very few. Agent Mulder never returned those emails.

What happened to end those relationships?

Poor ratings, or the desire to get out before it jumped the shark, you know?

THE BACHELOR / BACHELORETTE
GIRL QUESTIONNAIRE

What are your hobbies?

Thinking about love, brushing my hair, reading books about how to find love, moisturizing, checking my love horoscope, getting spa treatments to keep me young-looking, planning my wedding.

What is the unique talent of which you are most proud?

The ability to fall deeply in love, within a couple days, while surrounded by a production crew.

List the 3 adjectives that best describe you:

Sweet & humble, but incredibly sexy in an America-friendly manner.

Do you have any tattoos? If yes, what are they? And where are they located on your
body?

I do not, because I have not met my true love and do not know what name to put in the middle of the heart.

What accomplishment are you most proud of?

This application form.

Why haven’t you found the man of your dreams?

I have been looking in all the wrong places! Real life, book clubs, hushed movie theaters, the reference section, & ice cream socials.

The End.

I am also to include anywhere from 5-15 photos, showing my beauty, fun-loving nature and ability to be photogenic and tv ready.

Time for a trip to Glamor Shots! Their soft focus lighting and wide variety of colourful backdrops can't be beat.

With bucketfuls of Love,
Michelle

there is a good 'checking out books' pun in here somewhere

2010-05-20T20:07:00.007-04:00

I've noticed a blog that has be bouncing around amongst other bloggers for a little while.

And recently another fellow blogger friend of mine posted it to FB, so I thought it was time for me to get posting, since every time I see it, I chuckle.

Without further ado, I present...

Hot Guys Reading Books

There is beauty in its simplicity.

M.

When I grow up, I wanna be Fey-mous

2010-05-18T22:50:00.003-04:00

I couldn't let this day pass without a blog tribute to my favourite lady, Tina Fey, whose birthday is today.

Hilarious. Always.

Happy Birthday.

loquacious

2010-05-17T03:00:00.004-04:00

I saw this and thought of you...

xkcd: http://xkcd.com/741/

Generating content is hard, yo. But I do understand that if I fail to update frequently, my audience grows tired & frustrated by my non-posting shenanigans.

I never want to sully our relationship, my dear readers.

The blog is a funny thing, on occasion I'll read an old post and think huh, when did I write that? The digital museum of my memories are there and they are even better than my actual memory, which may or may not be a good thing, in the end.

I guess that's why I never get too opiniony or controversial on the blog, some may say it's a lack of confidence, others may think it wise. It's hard to say who is right (see, I did it again).

That's part of the whole social media animal, our memories, our conversations, our once held and perhaps now abandoned or revised beliefs and opinions are saved, logged and available for us, and many others to review well into the future.

[We can call this post "Stating the Obvious" for $1000 Alex.]

I just have been thinking a bit about memory lately. I recently remembered someone that had dropped off my radar in every way.

Part of this is because we lost touch in the regular way, and they were part of my life in a very specific time & place.

But, the other part of it was, they aren't on my facebook, or twitter, or blog list. I don't receive any emails from them, and they don't ever pop up on chat.

However, there are many people I have 'lost touch' with, but I know about their lives, because online we're still 'friends'.

I'm not the first or the last to wax about this issue, but it's very strange when you recall someone that has been actually authentically absent from every facet of your life.

Call it memory 2.0.

I know I have some readers of this blog, who I knew in 'real life' but have not seen or interacted with, beyond blog comments, in a long time (Hi everyone!) and there are some readers who only know me virtually, who may only know me through the vague lens of what I write here.

It's just a funny thing is all, when you really think about it.

What kind of a relationship do we have?

It may be one sided (you may not have a blog/FB/twitter or you may lurk or we might simply have never been in the same room together).

I'm a bit demanding, I ask you a Lot of questions (polls, rhetorically, redundantly) .

We hardly ever fight, but again, I do tend to protect myself from that kinda thing by never recording any debate worthy posts..

Down with bad drivers & inconsiderate library patrons! Up with rainbows, & unicorns & cups of tea!

Although, I can be difficult to deal with, I'm often late (I promise to post everyday...ever other day...at least a couple times a week..), I can be crabby (slow walkers, blah blah, cable companies boo hoo..) and I like to have my way (read about my free sample joy!)

You don't seem to be afraid of commitment, it's been a few years and you're still reading.

And, I still get lots of blog love, which is like human love, only slightly pixelated.

I guess we're doing okay dear readers, maybe not Dr. Phil Relationship Rescue healthy, but I think we crazy kids are gonna make it.

*

m.

this blog has it all! viral video! polls! blatant egoism!

2010-05-14T21:15:00.006-04:00

These are brilliant & hilarious & they're not supposed to be; "fashion" infomercials - Top 10 Infomercials

It's difficult to choose a favourite, for the the sheer awesome factor, I have to say number 2, although I could probably get good use out of number 7, before I make tea, I could just slap it on, then no worries.

There are some prime christmas gift ideas here.

Do yourself a favour and watch at least the first couple (and #7 for the visuals alone), guaranteed fun!

(via Go Fug Yourself)

*

Poll results:

Bon Jovi was our clear winner with 6 votes for Living on a Prayer.

*Sweet 80's included for your enjoyment.

Tied for second place, are Don't Stop Believing & Total Eclipse of the Heart, with 3 each...

...turn around....

Tied for last place are Hungry Eyes & I want it that way

There was also one write in vote for Every Rose has its Thorn

I think we've all learned a valuable couple of lessons here today,

First, my blog readers are awesome.

Next: the bigger the hair, the better the song.

Third: it is impossible to hear Hungry eyes and not think about Dirty Dancing, unless maybe you're a guy.

And finally, we've got to hold on to what we've got, 'cause it doesn't make a difference, if we make it or not, we've got each other and that's a lot.

There was one naysayer, come on naysay...you don't have one guilty pleasure song? Never hum along with an MJ classic on the radio, or tap your foot to a random boyband or one-hit-wonder?

*

Hello! Canada magazine has named its 50 most beautiful Canadians and I have to say me (and my Mom) are shocked that I didn't make the list.

Why? Justin Bieber.

I mean, if that Bieber kid can not only make the list, but the cover no less? Why shouldn't the rest of us pleasant looking Canadians?

We have a small population compared to our landmass, let's make this thing comprehensive and not hand everything over to the teeny bopper.

He's like 16..he's likely not always going to look like that.

Case study: I used to have a crush (when I was 12) on a certain boyband hottie and he hasn't really aged well. Especially given what these young stars have access too. Partying is not good for the complexion.

And I have something much more important, Inner beauty (again, talk to my Mom).

And I would definitely (probably) make it to the list of top-300 000-pleasant-looking-information-professionals-under-40-in-Canada. (hey CLA, idea!)

*

New poll up.

for my Mom

2010-05-09T14:28:00.001-04:00

Me too Jann, me too. Happy Mother's Day Momma! Love you.

Michelle

Here's some random stuff

2010-05-05T22:00:00.000-04:00

(you can totally skip this part, unless you really care about ice cream, then, carry on)

I have harped on this particular issue before, but I'm nothing, if not consistent.

Why doesn't anyone walk with purpose anymore? Don't they have anywhere to go?

I do, just the other night, it was 31 cent scoop night at Baskin Robbins, the only thing standing in my way of delicious, cheap ice cream were the 10 000 people strolling Slowly in front of me all the way there.

I had purpose! I had 31 cents!

(although both the federal & Quebec govt's recently made a pledge to rob me of every single penny I possess for 'taxation purposes', I still had some change on my desk they hadn't claimed.)

For the record, I had mint chip, and it was delicious.

This made me realize 3 things:

1. I will go the distance for a good deal (at least 4-6 blocks)

2. I no longer have an ability to stroll

3. I am becoming wildly impatient in my old age

*

Okay, that is probably enough whining now.

Time for another chapter of Michelle's Ongoing Positivity Project:

+ This super awesome, tiny apartment in Hong Kong (via Good)

+ There is a positive correlation between listening to the music of Glee and really productive collection development. Just sayin'

+ New teas from Kusmi: Detox & Genmaicha

+ New teas from David's Tea: Coco Chai Rooibos & Read my lips

+ Short sleeve weather

+ Positive feedback

*

I just finished Chuck Klosterman's Eating the Dinosaur and there was a line in it that I particularly liked, in an essay about the Unabomber no less:

"The degree to which anyone values the Internet is proportional to how valuable the Internet makes that person."

Klosterman, C. (2010). "Fail" (p.224) In Eating the Dinosaur, Toronto: Scribner.

*

I like this A Lot, and can absolutely relate to it, given all my years of commuting via public transit. It's pitch perfect passive aggressive.

TTCC etiquette campaign (National Post)

*

Here's some fun - Ten Word Wiki

Just how it sounds, a wiki, that defines words, in exactly ten words.

So I definitely looked up librarian, it is my defacto search:

Librarian: Superhero who can find anything. Penchant for cats and cardigans.

Canada: Similar to America, except more laid-back, better at hockey.

Chuck Norris: No entry. You don't find Chuck Norris. He finds you.

*

New poll up.

*

M to the L.

twenty nine years, 29 facts

2010-05-03T12:37:00.001-04:00

Michelle by the Numbers

Number of jobs held to date: 9

Number of dwellings to date: 7

Number of [completely unprovoked] bird attacks to date: 3

Number of academic subjects I've librarianed: 5

Number of non-familial housemates to date: 6

Number of Canadian provinces lived in: 2

Number of pairs of high heeled shoes owned to date: 3 [none of them still exist in my possession]

Number of pairs of Crocs owned to date: 6 [most of them still exist in my possession]

Number of cardigans in my closet: 15

Number of accurate 1st page google hits for my name [with no limiters]: 1

Number of accurate 1st page google hits for my name [Limiter - Cdn pages]: 5

Number of accurate 1st page google image hits for my name [and I'm wearing a super cute sweater]: 1

**

Michelle, word for word

Name origin and meaning: Hebrew/French; Who Is Like God? Who resembles God? Close to God. [my parents had no idea, trust me]

If life was a sitcom, my catch phrase would be: "Good times."

Nicknames: Meshell, Myshell, Michee, Michelley, Shell, M, mlake, Miss Lake, 'Miss', Mrs. Lake/Prof. Lake (my students were confused about me)

In my memoir, the title of this chapter will be: Capital "L" Librarian

Most stereotypical literary character crush: Mr. Darcy

Best advice I was ever given: Just let it go.

Top 4 favourite movie lines:

Get busy living, or get busy dying.

Ah... Are you telling me that you built a time machine... out of a DeLorean?

Let me help you. Step down. Here we go! The drum major's widow! She's worn his coat since the day he died. The horse's head has lost an ear! That's the florist laughing. He has crinkly eyes. In the bakery window, lollipops. Smell that! They're giving out melon slices! Sugarplum, ice cream! We're passing the park butcher. Ham, 79 francs. Spareribs, 45! Now the cheese shop. Picadors are 12.90. Cabecaus 23.50. A baby's watching a dog that's watching the chickens. Now we're at the kiosk by the metro. I'll leave you here. Bye!

What a crazy random happenstance.

Inside the Actor's Studio 2.0

1. What is your favorite word?

Sweet. (yeah, I know..it's unfortunate)

2. What is your least favorite word?

Payment.

3. What turns you on?

Humour, cleverness, and Britishness.

4. What turns you off?

Lackadaisical hygiene
Poor library etiquette

5. What sound do you love?

The things on my iPod
Crunchy leaves

6. What sound do you hate?

Pen clicking, it drives.me.nuts.

7. What is your favorite curse word?

Bloody hell

8. What profession other than yours would you like to attempt?

Writing, in some capacity. Something in the media perhaps.

9. What profession would you not like to do?

Steel work/factory work, I know how hard my Dad works and that I could never do what he does.

10. If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?

You were funny, I like funny.

M.

if you love cardigans, you might want to read on, if not, skip it.

2010-04-24T14:09:00.004-04:00

I LOVE this blog. (warning Glee related content)

What Would Emma Pillsbury Wear? (via Go Fug Yourself)

If I had the money, there would be some serious shopping in my future.

*

M.

snacks & fear of aging

2010-04-22T17:50:00.006-04:00

I like that I live in a world where this is considered a 'cookie'...

...and really, it's a cookie with a piece of a chocolate bar attached to it, brilliant!

Maybe it's time to rename the ol' blog "this is why michelle is chubby" ala This is why you're fat.

*

In healthier food news, I believe my bananas are attempting to communicate with me.

This week the stickers say "I <3 Lunch Boxes".

When really, they don't, unless they have a Banana Guard, which I do not.

Also, I no longer have a lunch box, it's actually more of a bag. I think the last lunch box I had was pink and had Barbie on it.

For all the above stated reasons, my bananas cannot join me at work.

*

So, in a week or so, I'm turning 29. This freaks me out a little, I will admit. How shall I remedy this?

Let's look at some of my contemporaries & see how we stack up.

Also born in 1981:

Elijah Wood - well, he's pretty successful, lots of movies and such, but his feet were way hairy in that ring movie.

Point ->Michelle.

-

Justin Timberlake - he's sold millions of albums, & has been a surprise hit on SNL.

Point -> contemporary Timberlake

(maybe we should team up, Lake & Timberlake bringing sexy & methodically structured powerpoints back)

-

Paris Hilton - yeah, she's a millionaire and yeah she has international stardom, but which one of us is known for losing dogs & not understanding what a 'walmart' is?

Point -> Michelle

-

Beyoncé Knowles - successful, famous, pretty, talented, married to Jay-Z, and seems like a nice lady. Also: all of this.

Point -> Contemporary Knowles

-

Britney Spears

Point -> Michelle

-

The De Lorean- only produced for about a year and the only car to ever come out of the DMC plant. WAS THE TIME MACHINE IN BACK TO THE FUTURE.

Point -> De Lorean

-

MTV - an all music channel designed to showcase contemporary music videos and musicians, pioneered the format & programming like the Unplugged series, animated series like Undergrads & Daria; is now responsible for The Hills and Jersey Shore.

Point -> It's a tie.

-

Michelle - is a working librarian, with plenty of friends, a supportive family, an apartment with central air, a wide variety of teas to drink and a loyal blog readership.

29 ain't so bad.

M.

*

so, this is the post where I talk about musicals.

2010-04-20T22:15:00.004-04:00

Boy...

...I sure do love Glee.

Tonight was the all-Madonna episode, and the grand finale?

My favourite material girl song, Like a Prayer.

*

FAQ

1. Q: Michelle, do you wish life was a musical?

A: Yes, I do.

*

2. Q: What is your favourite musical?

A: That would have to be a toss up between Moulin Rouge! and The Sound of Music.

*

3. Q: Aren't musicals a little ridiculous? I mean people don't just burst into song for no reason, it's completely unrealistic!

A: No, shut up.

Also, mr./ms. realism, when did you last hang out with a hobbit or house elf?

*

4. Q: Isn't Glee like that High School Musical Disney show?

A: No. No it is not.

*

5. Q: Okay, fine. You like musicals, but Glee is just all singing and dancing, what's in it for me?

A: Jane Lynch.

*

6. Q: Getting back to this 'life as a musical' thing, do you think your life could be made into a watchable musical?

A: Yes, although it might disturb the patrons and I will require Gene Kelly.

*

7. Q: You understand that I think you're lame, right?

A: Meh, look who I've got on my side.

*

So long, farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, goodbye.

17/04/10

2010-04-17T11:08:00.006-04:00

My banana stickers have ads on them. These ads are particularly clever because they are for the Wii and its accompanying game 'Super Monkeyball Step & Roll'.

Hey kids!!!!! I know you may not enjoy eating fruit all that much, but remember that video game Mom won't buy you..remember!!! The one with the monkeys!!!

Ah, inescapable consumer culture, it's what's for breakfast!

*
Poll results

I am tired because: I have a sleep debt.

This is probably very very accurate.

In second place, were the people who were also super tired and didn't know why.

And the runners up were: I'm getting old, I have too much spirit of librarianship and I'm too awesome.

Thanks for playing this round of 'everything on my blog is about me!'

*

How do we feel about this whole "twitter being archived by the LoC" business?

A friend sent me the G&M article and asked if I had seen it...I had definitely heard about it (all over twitter, the librarians were atwitter..)

Then I read the comments on the article (which I usually don't do for fear that I lose faith in humanity, or at the very least feel really sad).

Librarians (generally, I'm generalizing) seem pretty jazzed about the whole thing.

Whereas the readers of the Globe, are not.

Sometimes, I think that librarians live in a very different world then everyone else, possibly a world of our own making, [which may not be entirely healthy] :P

I do think that someone needs to start archiving social media and internet content in a real way, otherwise, what will we leave behind except a big carbon footprint and a lot of technology waste?

It's funny to think that Justin Bieber's name will be featured highly in a library of congress file...

But, I also think that the citizen journalism (like in Iran and Haiti) that is happening on twitter and the sharing of information in such a quick and widely accessible way is brilliant.

Why not keep a record of it?

(Also, some of the people I follow are hilarious and I am all for putting a little humour back into such a large and important institution.)

The questions raised by a couple of friends are not why, but rather how...? and where?

There are also some copyright questions, some privacy questions locked vs public vs retweeted vs...you get the picture..

Maybe the LoC themselves can shed some light:

"So if you think the Library of Congress is “just books,” think of this: The Library has been collecting materials from the web since it began harvesting congressional and presidential campaign websites in 2000. Today we hold more than 167 terabytes of web-based information, including legal blogs, websites of candidates for national office, and websites of Members of Congress.

We also operate the National Digital Information Infrastructure and Preservation Program www.digitalpreservation.gov, which is pursuing a national strategy to collect, preserve and make available significant digital content, especially information that is created in digital form only, for current and future generations.

In other words, if you’re looking for a place where important historical and other information in digital form should be preserved for the long haul, we’re it!" (Library of Congress Blog)

We'll keep watching and we'll keep asking questions, my question for today is: Wouldn't that be a wicked cool place to work?

*

Speaking of kids..which I was, two sections ago..sorta...anyway..

I found this on one of my blogs, it's basically a cubicle for children.

I'm not going to insert any commentary, I just thought it should be seen.

M.

Look what I got in the mail:

2010-04-15T19:55:00.004-04:00

Free office supplies! booyeah!

I mean really, they found the perfect demographic to give these too.

This is honestly the only thing I'm writing about in this post.

Keep the awesome free samples coming, because it brings joy to my life.

good mail day.

that is all.

M.

conversating

2010-04-13T22:35:00.005-04:00

There is a cellphone problem at our library. Everyone knows it, they can all hear it.

At least half of our patrons are talking on their phones in the library at all points throughout the day.

My central question on the blog isn't how we solve this, or wondering if everyone has lost their ability to be polite and respect others. Those are questions for other people and they are questions which are currently being asked in a lot of places.

No, my question is: Who are all these people talking too?

I'm no fan of the phone, but I have a cell. However, I can't remember the last time I was on it for an extended period of time, during the day, when I wasn't in my apartment.

In fact, the last lengthy phone conversation I had with anyone, was with the fine people at student loans.

Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I really can't imagine what all the talk is about.

*

I mean I understand that a cell is invaluable for making plans or meeting up with people.

I do find it difficult to remember what me and my friends did before we all had them, but I never feel the need to spend much time beyond a 'where are you' or 'when can we meet' conversation, if I'm out and about, living my life.

Maybe the simple explanation is, with students, the library is on campus and all of campus is home.

But, I think the library is just a microcosm of what's happening out on the sidewalks and in the malls of the real world. Most people are on the phone in most places I go.

Perhaps it will have to remain an unsolved mystery or maybe these people are just more popular than I am...

Or maybe all my other librarian friends spend so much time asking people to put away their cell phones all day long, that they don't have the heart to call each other on them.

M.

I'm almost positive

2010-04-12T18:28:00.007-04:00

Michelle's Ongoing Positivity Project:

+ Blistex Raspberry Lemonade Blast lip balm

+ new Glee this week

+ Chris Leavins Story Hour podcast (on itunes)

+ Weezer [and the fact that Rivers thought this song was 'more appropriate for toddlers']

+ spring-ish weather

+ end of the term

+ finding reasonably priced produce

+ Guacamole, just in general.

+ tea on sale

+ you!

Feel free use the comments to tell me what you're feeling positive about this week, let's make it a collaborative project.

+ collaboration

on short pants & long elevator rides

2010-04-11T16:57:00.008-04:00

a couple thoughts about shopping.

I went on a mission to find some new summer capris, I did not fulfill this mission. This is because every single pair or capris I found in every store had zippers on the bottom, like 80's style.

This is absolutely unacceptable.

Maybe I need to look at less trendy places.

*

Ok let's talk jeans. I need a new pair.

Here is my message to retailers: I notice all your denim is either 'distressed' or skinny or both.

I do not want those jeans, because I am neither distressed or skinny*. [*I like cake, and sitting and sleeping.]

*

I just bought a dress that is uncharacteristically short for me. We'll see how that goes. And it will go, 'cause I have a mental block against buying things and then not using them.

*

Things that aren't shopping.

I'm testing a Sony eReader for work. I'm kinda jazzed to see how it goes, because I'm not a huge ebook fan generally speaking, but I feel like a reader might change my mind.

I'll let you know what I think.

*

Note to the guy in the laundry room: Pacing behind me while I'm putting my clothes (including underpants) into the washing machine ain't cool and now I think you're super creepy.

Next time I see you in the elevator, I might push all the buttons right before I get off, Buddy the elf style.

*

You know what words I always spell incorrectly? Inconvenient and maintenance. Always.

*

I saw a few moments of the new Doctor Who the other night and I must say, I'm intrigued. I used to love the old series, and watched it with my Dad.

The new one looked rather clever and funny. Not to mention the fact that I saw John Simm on screen, whom I adore.

Might be one to try out in the near future.

Do you watch it? Thoughts? Comments?

*

M.

Only 120 calories per serving [contains 5000 servings]

2010-04-11T13:42:00.003-04:00

For those of you who may have missed it, here, in all its glory, is Tina Fey's Brownie Husband commercial from SNL last night.

I laughed a lot, I will confess.

**Edit: well that's gone now. And I live in Canada, so no videos for me. You can try to google it, maybe you'll have some luck.

bam!

2010-04-07T21:12:00.005-04:00

The debate is over:

By one vote, Superman wins in the ultimate contest of superhero vs. superalien.

In the battle of the Batmen, there was no clear winner, but, there was a very clear loser: Val Kilmer with....no votes.

Adam West & Christian Bale tied for first and I gotta say, that's probably pretty true, Bale is known for being kinda mean and difficult and West is known for this....& this. Unpredictable to say the least.

Tied for second are the original movie Batman, Mr. Mom himself, Michael Keaton and Clooney.

Clooney can do almost no wrong in my opinion...with the exception of attempting to be Batman. Stick to tuxes and wittily fast talking Matt Damon.

Do you know what I was sad about when I was like 14? My beloved Mulder, David Duchovny was apparently asked to be the new Batman, but they went with Clooney instead. I now realize what a terrible hot mess that would have been.

That's probably enough about Batman.

New poll up.

M.

***Edit: So, I just looked up the release date of Batman & Robin and it was 1997, so I was 16 when it came out. That's a bit old to be upset about Mulder..but...I was.

owls are so 2009

2010-04-03T13:43:00.001-04:00

www.nataliedee.com

unhinged

2010-03-30T20:55:00.004-04:00

big news in the chocolate world.

Kinder Surprise now comes in an easy open hinged plastic container! Easy-open!

I have many a childhood memory of struggling in vain to open my prize and then needing to ask one of my parents or my much stronger, younger sister to help me get it out.

I think many of us share that memory and now, these kids today, will have no trouble at all getting their toy surprise, no effort, no struggle.

also, check out the slightly psychotic looking blue felt covered bunny surprise I got, he's going on my desk:

M.

tea and (not with), ewan mcgregor

2010-03-28T15:13:00.004-04:00

I just spilled tea on my coffee table (at this point I should just call it my tea table) and soaked my laptop case, and the book I'm currently reading (not to worry, it's mine, not a library book).

I'm talented.

*

Mini Movie Review: The Ghost Writer

Good solid film, performances worth watching (just don't pay close attention to magically disappearing accents), very atmospherey and creepy in a political intrigue kinda way.

Does keep you guessing.

And you get to watch Ewan McGregor, if that's your thing.

[Director: Roman Polanski, Actors: Pierce Brosnan, Kim Cattrall, Olivia Williams, Tom Wilkinson]

It reminded me of Michael Clayton in it's atmospheric feel, the twists and turns and such...if you haven't seen Michael Clayton, you ought too.

[Clooney, Tom Wilkinson, Sydney Pollack, Tilda Swinton]

*

M.

not delightful

2010-03-26T23:06:00.001-04:00

I hate this commercial...

I find it disturbing and creepy.

That is all.

Skidamarink

2010-03-25T22:24:00.002-04:00

How do people manage to take care of others..like kids and stuff?

It's 8:51pm and I am finally making something that resembles dinner for myself.

And it's pasta. Which means I'm boiling water.

*

I feel like everyone ought to read this article about The Simpsons and it's effect on our lexicon.

PopWatch: The Simpsons greatest gift to us? Yoink.

I heartily agree, my sister and I basically speak as if we currently live & work in Springfield.

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You know what's annoying about spring? Today, it was sunny and I wore my lightly lined spring trench and tonight, it's going to hit -11, feels like -19. Horrible.

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Every-time I open my personal email, I am confronted by no less than 5 emails that are each suggesting new and wonderful ways for me to part with my meager 'disposable' income.

And it's not spam, it's various things through which I have rewards or places I may have bought something in the past..but geez louise guys, I'm only a librarian, not a Rockefeller.

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Anyone else having trouble reconciling Mr. Sulu selling us tv's? Anyone?

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You know whose tweets are interesting and fun? @ebertchicago (Roger Ebert)

I've decided I'm going to be very current and trendy, so here is what's trending on Twitter RIGHT NOW and my comments about these hot topics!

Trendz with librarian michelle

#nowplaying : well, that heinous Marriage Ref came on the channel I was watching, but I promptly turned that off in favour of Ace of Cakes.

Syracuse : is a city, in the United States.

#mychildwillnever : eat dinner on time, apparently.

I <3 McFly : Marty McFly foreva!

I <3 : You? I <3 you in the morning and in the afternoon, I <3 you in the evening, underneath the moon.

#SometimesiWonder : if anyone actually reads my tweets.

I <3 SimplePlan : I love simple plans, like watching a movie at home with some snacks.

Cuse : That is not in the Scrabble Dictionary. Can't help you.

Justin Bieber : he was born, in 1994 and he is a trending topic, 1994.

Hey, remember the 1994 Lillehammer Olympics? Justin doesn't.

#idiot2 : legit 2 quit.

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M.

batty batty bat

2010-03-23T20:05:00.006-04:00

Anyone thinking about sending me a easter gift, you know, because we both share a common love of the bunny, or you are aware of my love for the end of wintertime, this would be just lovely.

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I missed Free Pastry Day at Starbucks. I even had an email reminder about it. fail.

I love pastry and I really love it when pastry is free.

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My friends and I were recently having a friendly argument about who might win in a fight between Batman & Superman.

I say Batman because he has the power vengeance and really cool gadgets on his side. And you know, Alfred and stuff.

My friend argued Superman because 'he's an alien!' I disagree that this is a valid point.

So, it's the new poll.

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Also, a nod to my favourite unicorn: Prince ShimmerShine Moodreams Blogging Adventure is currently running a poll to find out which comic strip character you would date, and I think you should vote in that poll as well.

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Bonus poll: Which batman would be the last bat-man standing in a fight of all batmen?

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So this post was mostly about food and the caped crusader, sorry about that.

M.